'Right Place----Wrong Time...............As Per Usual............"

Good Afternoon;

Sometimes life is like a song....

In my case:

I been in the right place but it must have been the wrong time

I'd have said the right thing but I must have used the wrong line

I been in the right trip but I must have used the wrong car

My head was in a bad place and I'm wondering what it's good for

I been the right place but it must have been the wrong time

My head was in a bad place but I'm having such a good time

I been running trying to get hung up in my mind

Got to give myself a good talking-to this time

Just need a little brain salad surgery

Got to cure my insecurity

I been in the wrong place but it must have been the right time

I been in the right place but it must have been the wrong song

I been in the right vein but it seems like the wrong arm

I been in the right world but it seems wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong

Slipping dodging sneaking creeping hiding out down the street

See me life shaking with every ho' I meet

Refried confusion is making itself clear

Wonder which way do I go to get on out of here

I been in the right place but it must have been the wrong time

I'd have said the right thing but I must have used the wrong line

I'd have took the right road but I must have took a wrong turn

I'd have took the right move but I made it at the wrong time

I been on the trip road but I must have used the wrong car

My head was in a good place and I wonder what it's bad for.

Thank You, Mac Rebennac AKA;

Dr.John The Night Tripper

It seems that every time I hear about a program or an opening or a grant for housing..it is the day after it closes, or is filled, or has expired.

Not only that, can someone tell me why every time I meet the woman who would make the perfect companion,

AAAHHHHRRGGGGHHHH!

Why do I always end up next to the most annoying people at the computers here at the library!!! The old biddy next to me is sitting and popping and cracking her gum at the rate of 30 snaps a minute!! And it is not the typical young brainless baby's mama, but some old white woman! And on the other side the evil old bigoted, racist, white haired witch just sat down..............AARRRGGHHHHH!!!!....On and On and On........I'm about to lose it today!!!!

(sorry about that)

she is either gay or with someone else, (happily, damn it!), in a long term relationship.

Yeah, well, if you could not tell, being alone is getting to me at the moment. It was exacerbated by a surprise visit at the coffee shop in Mt. Washington yesterday evening of my friend Michelle, artist, professor at MICA, mother of an adorable little girl, faithful supporter...and all, around wonderful person. Oh yeah, and married....lol!

But seriously, she is a good friend and we had a chance to catch up a bit on each other's lives. And she also rang in with the opinion...."You ought to write a book!", Again, I tried to explain my fears and self doubts about having the ability to write a continuous, coherent manuscript....but, being a teacher, she shot me down and cut me no slack in that direction....lol! I do think I have enough stories to keep a reader interested and amused, but not the skills to put them in the proper form.

I am going to try to find a way to get ahold of an old laptop, maybe if I had the opportunity to sit and write without having a time limit and so much distraction, I could do it. I'd like to, I know that. We shall see what will arise in the next month or so.

I left the Starbucks with Jenn after her meeting last night and we puttered around the Giant for an hour, then I hit the gas station and gave the State it's $2.00. I went into the shed and watched "Jeeves And Wooster" on the DVD player until the battery died and went to sleep about 2:00 am.

This morning I woke up to rain and ended up dozing on and off for an hour at a time until I finally got out of the sleeping bag around 12:30 pm. I went into the Giant to use the restroom, shave and brush my teeth and then get something to eat. It was a zoo, it was so crowded the store manager and the major department managers were on the registers and bagging groceries...you would think there was a snow storm headed for Baltimore... all the milk, bread, and toilet paper being sold.....lol!

Oh great now the crazy deaf woman sits down on one side and moves the computer all the way to the other side of the desk and turns the screen so it can't be seen, and begins her mumbling...while on the OTHER side of me the hip-hop girly boys are watching YouTube dance videos and 'vogueing'...until they will be thrown out....AGAIN!....I repeat....AAARRGGHHHHH!!!

Anyway, I've got to go eat something, it is 4:30 pm. and I have not had breakfast yet, except for a cup of coffee and a handful of honey toasted pecans.

It must be the rain bringing all the crazies out today...but what is bringing them all over next to me!!!???!!! I mean, I'm lonely, but not THAT lonely...LOL!!!

Later.....Dave

"WeakEnd Update..................."

Good Afternoon, Again;

Well I spent 3 nights inside last week, Wed., Thur., & Fri., at Jenn's doing some babysitting. I left Saturday afternoon to run down to Monkee's to get my week's worth of meds, forgetting that it was Preakness Day until I got to the Metro station and the train was both late and packed. Then when I got to the Hopkins station the connecting buses were running every other scheduled bus, because so many buses were being run on lines servicing the Pimlico Racetrack. I got back just in time to see the race on TV at Jenn's, (I broke even, or a little bit ahead, by balancing bets on the favorites and by taking a 16-1 wager AGAINST! Calvin Borel, {riding the Derby winner Super Saver}, that wiped out all the losses! I could not refuse the odds the guy gave me, and besides, he is an arrogant jerk and it was a pleasure watching himtry to weael out of his bet and then have to pay me in front of a room full of witnesses....rotflmao!!!), I knew my worst possible loss would be $5.00 and my highest possible win could have been $370.00, as it stands, I believe I am the cost of a six-pack of National Boh Ice ahead...lol!

When I left Jenn's after the race, I took the Metro to the Light Rail to Mt. Washington to the Starbucks, looping around most of the traffic leaving town. There were a few 'infielders' on the trains, you could tell by the bright pink complexions....seems nobody brought the sunscreen...lol.

When I left the coffee shop you could see the thin slice of the crescent moon and the reflected dim shadow of the full disk of the moon, and just above it was the planet Venus, in the opposite corner of the sky was the planet Mars shining redly and the planet Saturn could be seen as a pale yellow point in the sky. Plus as I got off the bus at the Plaza Metro station the International Space Station could be seen crossing the sky. All in all a pretty spectacular display!

I ended up reading for a few hours in the shed by the light of my new lantern and fell asleep about 2:00 am.

Sunday, I slept late and I went to the Starbucks around 1:00 pm. and sat out on the back patio until closing at 8:00 pm., and it was still full daylight. This early daylight savings time is good about this time of year.

I had a conversation with a woman with whom I had been passing the time of day with for the past year. She came and sat outside and asked me, "It was you in the Baltimore Magazine, wasn't it?", I laughed and said yes and the Jewish Times too. We talked about the causes and and effects of homelessness, and the rise in both quantity and visibility over the past 30 years. I tried to explain about shelters and the truth versus the public perception of them.

I sat outside the First Watch Cafe and read until about Midnight and went in and watched a video until 2:00 am.

Well the 6,000 mark has been broken, according to Sitemeter, I just want to say Thanks, and 'keep coming back'......(LOL!)

Later.......Dave

"Rainy Days And Mondays Always Make Me Round..................................."

Good Afternoon;

So, it's raining and I'm kind of bored and I went to the Giant hungry.

Now I'm coming down with a terminal case of the munchies...lol.

I've got nothing to get done today, which is a good thing because I have the motivation of your basic, "Dazed And Confused", "Half Baked", "Pineapple Express", pot head.............LOL!

(without the weed!!!)

Out Of Time....Later...Dave

"Generation Next..............................."

Good Afternoon;

The underlined words below are a link to a very good YOUTUBE video that is like a reverse palindrome....Watch, Listen and Read....there is hope for the future!

Lost Generation

Thanks, Janis, for the 'forward'.

Also, see the comment on the previous post, it answers my question as to why the sudden increase of hits from the UK.

The concept behind the distribution of the 'Big Issue' is a good one that has been used in the States at different times and places also. At one point, the Baltimore Sun being sold on some street corners were donated papers to homeless folks as a way to make some cash, but it mostly went to drugs. I do not know if it still being done now or not.

I'll be back a bit later........Dave

"Birthday Pizza..................Birthday Cake........................."

Good Afternoon;

Welcome to the newest 'Follower', Lindsey, thanks for reading.

So I have spent the past 2 nights at Jenn's and since I am babysitting the grandmonsters again this evening, and early tomorrow morning, I'll be there again tonight.

Yesterday I took, (Jenn drove), Rachel and Jenn, and Ed and Devin to CiCi's Pizza Buffet over on Rt. 40 West just past Rolling Road. $5.99 @ for adults & $2.99 for kids under 10 years old, and $1.99 for kids under 3 years old, and drinks are $1.79. Everything is all you can eat or drink. The pizza is good for the price and there are also soup, pasta, cheesy bread, and a salad bar on the line. There were about 10 different types of pizza, including 'macaroni and cheese topped', w/ and w/out ground beef. There is also an 'apple pie pizza', gooey chocolate brownies and cinnamon rolls for dessert. Less than $30.00 for the 5 of us. There is also a small arcade in the back, with a few claw machines..(only the candy one pays off every time)..and a basketball toss and a race car game.

We walked over to the "DOLLAR TREE" across the lot, and Rachel went to town and got herself 11 different gifts and had a blast choosing.

Circumstances, 'iffy' weather, and a smaller budget than I wanted changed the plans I had in mind for her birthday, but we stopped at the Giant and I bought a heart shaped cake with red and orange roses and pink and purple accents on the white icing and we took it back to Jenn's where we sang Happy Birthday and ate it.

Her mom called right after and was able to pick her up, so that saved a bus and a train and a bus ride to Towson ..(and back for me).

As I said the day was not quite what I planned, but turned out to be a lovely day anyhow! Rachel and I are going to keep an eye out for the next show that is coming to town, (or movie), or event or exhibit at one of the museums or facilities in the area that she really wants to see and then save up for it and then just the two of us attend as a special delayed treat.

I am also talking with Jenn about taking everyone on a weekday excursion to Sandy Point State Park, as soon as the Bay water temps. are in the comfortable range. Rachel and I and her mom took a trip there a year and a half ago and she still talks about "going to the bay".

I am just killing time for a few hours, just to get some sunshine and take a break from the kids before returning to Jenn's this evening. I'll be gone from there by noonish tomorrow and back in the shed in later in the evening.

There has been a regular spate of hits on my little 'exercise in exorcism' here from the British Isles, logging in directly to the site, with no referral, other than a direct search for 'homelesscide'. There have been enough to trigger my interest as to whether it is a 'loyal reader' traveling or a local, (or local), who have taken an interest in our blog.

Speaking of interest, there has also been a continuing visitation from referrals out of the http://www.homelessincharmcity.com/ site that is published by a group of Towson University students examining homelessness in Baltimore.

We are only 39 visits away from 6,000 hits, a mere drop in the bucket compared to many sites, but hell, a truly amazing number to me, as is the fact that I have done this for 518 times!

I finally received my Medical Assistance card in the mail earlier this week, nearly a month after i was told it would be mailed out immediately, and 10 months after I became eligible, (but of course had no idea for 9 of thiose months..thank you D.S.S.), and I still have not gotten the M.C.O./H.M.O. information package comparing the different plans. I was able to renew my prescriptions without any problem last week, using my old M.A. card, which is exactly the same, as I informed the person in the membership office so they would not have to send a new one, but they insisted it would be different....yeah right....bureaucratic inefficiency in action.......lol!

I have to see Liz next week, if she is back from an emergency leave of absence, and get her to take me back over to the WalMart with the receipt for my new bag....which is splitting along some internal seams, I knew that it was too good to be true....SOMETHING had to go wrong....lol!

Okay I'm out of time for now, I guess I'll see you all tomorrow,.....if I survive the kids another day and night...lol!...or unless I find something interesting to do Saturday, then I'll be back Monday.

Later.........Dave

"Counting Blessings..............."

Good Morning;

Good Morning;

The above line is the font called 'Webdings',

mirroring the salutation above that.

No reason except curiousity to see what it was......lol.

So it rained like hell last night, technically early this morning, I woke up at 4:30 am. to 'visit the tree' and was forced to use the emergency backup system...lol!

I have been waking up early and then getting depressed recently due to the fact that there is really no place close, convenient, and comfortable to go to, so I have either just lay, (lie?), there until either 9:00 am. when the library opens, or more often until the back, bladder and boredom force me to move. It is a bit easier on days when I have an objective, somewhere to be, someone to meet or something to do...in most cases.

Today I got up about 10:15 am. and went to the Giant for coffee and to wash my face, and I ended up grabbing a package of steaks that was mis-priced and mis-labeled saving almost $6.00 a pound!

Jenn asked me to come over this afternoon and babysit the little darlings while she and Tom take his godfather out to dinner, (this is father of the young man who took his own life 2 weeks ago; he has also lost his wife, and 2 of his closest friends, one who had a stroke while at his dinner table!, the other being Tom's dad, all in the past 6 months. It is things like this that help me keep my life in perspective, and no matter how much I amy seem to whine at times, I am truly grateful for the blessings I have been given and the people in my life.), to try to show him love and support. From what I understand he is an episcopalian priest and a truly amazing and loving man.

I am about to go to Jenn's and drop off the food and then go down to the Central branch of the Enoch Pratt library. I am probably spendin the night at Jenn's and we are all going out for Rachel's birthday somewhere. I may not be back online until Thursday night late, or Friday.

Later......Dave

"Robots Rules Of Order.....OR.....Send In The Clones..........................."

Good Afternoon;

Well I am farther along in my quest to acquire enough cash to do something special with and for Rachel on her birthday Thursday, but not as far along as I would like to be. I tracked down the 'ex' yesterday and gave her the gift card to use at the Giant, and this morning as I was at the coffee machine in the store I ran into her doing some shopping, (alone Rachel was at the house of the family she stays with when her mother is at work), and I ended up with $42.00 when she was done. Because they are staying in the hotel with only a microwave and a small refrigerator there is not that much need for groceries. I want to raise another $40.00 to $60.00 if I can or we are going to have to revise our plans.

(There are still copies of my little book of poetry left at the affordable price of only $10.00 each. Every copy freshly baked and delivered daily, and signed by the author with apersonal endorsement to the purchaser! Every dollar helps!)

I am picking Rachel up at her mother's workplace on Thursday morning, or if I am staying at Jenn's, (still only a tentative plan), she may be dropped off there. Depending on the weather we may take all the kids out for a picnic in the park later that day.

It was nice wandering the Giant talking to the 'ex', almost a repeat of last night when I was doing the same with Jenn after her homegroup meeting and she gave me ride back to Pikesville.

I went to the Mt. Washington Starbucks after I saw Rachel's mom yesterday afternoon and just hung out and read and talked for a few hours.

At one point I took my personal insulated metal travel cup up the counter for a free refill, having added my 'secret recipe"...lol, of sweetener and sugar and flavoring, and the young woman barrista at the counter takes and rinses it out with hot water! I said no please don't ever rinse my cup, and she said it's company policy and she MUST do so, (she is not stationed at this store but has substituted here frequently enough to recognize me as a regular customer), and I commented that others did not rinse it without asking first, once requested not to...and I also mentioned that since she had looked into the cup and had seen the powdered and granulated substances at the bottom, which were obviously freshly added and not dregs or residue..why would she even rinse and dump it in the first place, again she parroted..'company policy', and added 'some people just can't follow company policy'..to which I replied...."SOME people are not mindless robots", and walked back to my table. Needless to say, for the next refill I waited until she was working the espresso machine and someone else was at the register....lol. This is one of the reasons I am frequenting the establishment less than I was before..(nicer weather is another, as is the faulty heating/cooling system..[which seems to be stuck on 'broil'...lol]..,it has also been too crowded recently and harder to find a seat)..the leaving of certain employees has changed the atmosphere there also, no one seems to be having fun anymore. Whether my praise and appreciative comments for the courtesies extended me that I related in the JT and BM articles had a negative 'trickle down' effect or not I do not know for sure, but it seems to illustrate the aphorism; "no good deed goes unpunished".

While I was sitting there reading the newspaper, Dave from Whole Foods came over and we got into a discussion about politics and how it sometimes bizarrely affected national and state borders around the world. Some of those little gouges and bulges not determined by terrain or rivers. Just as he was about to leave my phone rang and it was my first girlfriend Patti, calling from Florida. She was on the way to the beach to cool down and escape from family...(parent and sibling)...and boy do I relate to those feeling...LOL. we talked for almost a half hour, cell phone to cell phone, using up most of my minutes but accruing no long distance charges, one of the greatest boons of the cell phone age! When she gets back in the state we are going to hook up. When I asked what she was up to she mentioned that she has had the urge to travel since she took early retirement from teaching a few years ago. A few seconds later she asks me how long I could sit in a car, I replied, "how far ya goin'?, my Independence Card works anywhere in the country!"....... We are going to talk when she gets back....who knows, you may be reading "Homelesscide-- Life on the Interstate".....LOL!....from Public Libraries around the nation...and seriously, it isn't like I'm NOT packed up and ready to go.

As I was sitting reading I saw this familiar little blond haired head toddling across the floor and recognized Augustus, Kristen's son, and looked up to see her in line. I walked over to say hello and she told me that they were on their way over to sit with me as soon as they got their drinks. I was thinking about and mentioned to Kristen that it has been 10 years since we first met and how amazing those 10 years had been. It is really wonderful to watch a girl change to a young woman and mother. We were talking about Jenn and the grandkids and Rachel and her mom, and how some women are just naturally and instinctively good moms, and how surprising it is when someone who you never thought would be the maternal type turns out to be and want to be a 'Mommy'.

She asked me a few moments later what I thought made a woman a good 'Mommy', and I tried to define it and had trouble putting some of the inherent and intrinsic values into words. When we left the coffee shop to each head our separate ways, there was a guy playing a soprano sax..(that's the one that looks like a metal clarinet)..and we watched Gus dance and hand the guy a $1.00 bill. As we said goodbye I pointed to Gus and told her 'That's what makes good Mommy, whatever you're doing, keep doing it'. Her eyes got moist and told me I was sweet, I got embarrassed and gave her a hug and left, before I opened my mouth and dined on my foot, sans condiments...lol.

I wouldn't exactly call it 'unrequited love', but more "an unexpressed depth of feeling due to an acknowledged non-expected return of the same, there-by best remaining unvoiced", yeah...that's as clear as mud ain't it.

Usually, being old, fat, bald, broke and 'residentially challenged' frees me to express thoughts and emotions that would normally be restrained or repressed, having expectation of reciprocation allows for a refreshing honesty that mostly out weighs the hidden heartache. Telling someone the secrets of ones heart for the purely altruistic reason of hoping to bring them a boost to their own ego or self esteem is mostly worth the pain. .....mostly, but once in a while..it isn't.

Yeah...well, this is not the direction I was headed when I sat down at the keyboard today....lol! Good thing I am out of time. Depending on how hard it is raining, I'll either sit here and read or go to the coffee shop...I know, I know, but there really is nowhere else close to go.

See you tomorrow.........Dave

"Drain Bamage......................."

Good Afternoon;

I don't know what's up with me today. I can't seem to wake up and I'm sinking into a quagmire of the blahs, the blues, externally induced and influenced depression, and an enervating and de-motivating funk. I went into the Giant this morning and it was nearly impossible to even make a simple decision on what to get to eat, (and this was not due to monetary constraints, or just being tired of the same old selection this time), it took me over an hour of wandering and vacillating to finally buy something. I feel forgetful and my mind feels like it is wrapped in a big ball of cotton, similar to a pot buzz, but without the euphoria. I am hitting so many wrong or extra keys, or just missing them altogether as I type this that it is taking 10 times as long as usual. Thank goodness for Spellcheck...lol!

It is similar to a 'fugue state' aka 'disassociative amnesia', but so far no unexplained travel or disappearance....(damn, I could really use a 'road trip' about now!), remembering simple things is a chore and an effort, and I'm spacing out with no warning and not realizing it or having an awareness of it.

I know some of my depression ans anxiety is from the fact that Rachel's birthday is on Thursday, she will be 6 years old, and I do not know whether or not I am going to have the money to do something special with her and buy her a gift that she really wants. I was supposed to be trading some food credits for cash with the 'ex', having spoken to her about it a couple of weeks ago, and explaining the reason why I wanted to confirm that she would be amenable to it and would set aside the cash, but now she is seemingly avoiding the subject, so I do not know what is going on. This is consistent with previous behavior, making a promise or commitment that I or someone else takes on good faith as a certainty, and makes plans or arrangements predicated on her coming through, and she does not because it is 'inconvenient', or waiting to the last minute to tell me she won't be able to do what she had promised...or she won't answer the phone or call back until it is too late, leaving me in limbo, not knowing what is going on.

I am going to try to track her down when I am done here at the library and get a definite response one way or another. There is also mail for me from D.D.S., I asked her call me when she was back at the house Friday morning and I would meet her there and pick it up, or if she would not be there long, to call me and open it and read it over the phone to me....well it is Monday and I still have not heard back.

I am also fretting about how fast my money has already gone this month, with no extravagant expenditures. Most of the cash has gone to the usual necessities, bus pass, phone minutes, meds, food; some went to the two laundry fiascoes at Jenn's. (the unneeded detergent purchase, the need to do towels and only having a $5.00 bill to put on the card, and the other time I also only had a $5.00 bill), a bit went to food I shared with Jenn and Tom, and my one splurge on a burger at Jilly's and the $5.00 on the "Keno To Go". Not getting that little but of extra food from the coffee shop make a big difference. Oh, and I also sent off 4 $5.00 money orders to some of my causes, NCHV, Lupus, AHA, and one other which has slipped my mind..(see what I mean about the forgetting things)..and for the life of me I can't recall it....and I'm not about to root around in my bag for the stub at the moment to check...lol. Thinking that I had a confirmed trade caused me to be a little more free with my cash than I normally would be this early in the month.

Now I'm trying to figure out some sort of hustle for the rest of the month.

I left here Saturday and went to Jenn's, planning to wash and shower and get in and out in an hour or so and enjoy the great weather, but I ended up having to do towels first, and then I cooked some sausages and hash browns for lunch, and Tom came home and we talked for a while, when he left I got sucked into a show on the Discover Channel called "Tuna Wranglers", about commercial tuna fishermen in Australia....(where I really want to visit for an extended time), and Jenn came home with the grandmonsters and asked if I minded watching them while she did her food shopping...it was 10:30 pm. before I rolled out.....lol.

Sunday I went down to see Monkee in East Baltimore because I never made it Saturday, and ended up at the Starbucks about 11:00 am. I sat out on the patio talking to a large group folks who stop there most Sundays after 'church', (all I know is that they have a 'swami' as a leader...it is very interesting group of mostly white upper middle class people, and they say it is sort of 'universalism' theology), which is on Falls Road just across the river from the coffee shop. I am curious to see and hear their services, I may go one Sunday at 11:00 am.

I ran into John Erby and we talked for a while, and I was witness to a 2 car accident when this young woman backed into the only car around her for a hundred yards in any direction. She must have been a hurry, (and most likely on the phone, but that is only an unsubstantiated opinion), and put it in reverse, she was in an SUV with a trailer hitch that center punched the license plate of an Audi A4....(Owwww.....ooh that's gonna hurt her pocketbook....lol)....!

I gave the Audi owner, John, my name and cell phone #s for the insurance companies, if it get's that far. They arranged for the woman to first have an option to pay out of pocket if the damages were less than the deductible. the reason I am going into detail about this is to show that there are still decent folks like John, who are willing to give someone a break, instead of shouting for a lawyer at the first scent of a dollar sign.

I ended up closing up the coffe shop and catching the bus back to the Plaza station. There is the same bus driver every Sunday on the 27 route and he looks out for me at the stop, most other drivers come around the curve at full speed and sometimes don't even stop if you are not standing almost in the street waving them down. I was getting off the bus at the gas station when a Jeep stops in the middle of the street and a guy says "you want to go for a ride", I at first did not recognize my friend Mike, but after blocking the whole road I finally did and hopped in...lol. We cruised up to Reisterstown and he returned a vacuum cleaner and we stopped at "The Cow" ice cream stand, and he drove me back to Pikesville to the gas station where I donated my nightly $2.00 to the Maryland State Lottery.

I went to the shed and sprayed some more air freshener cover the lessening but still noticeable odor of the decomposing avian examples of Darwin's law of "Natural Selection" aka "Survival of the Fittest"....

I watched an episode of "Jeeves and Wooster", (it is still strange to see Hugh Laurie in this comedic stereotype as the rich, slightly clueless, English fop and then to see him as "House"), then fell asleep for about half an hour. I woke up and could not get back to sleep so I read for an hour and finally fell asleep around 2:00 am., waking up every hour on the hour until 7:00 am. when I fell back asleep until 9:45 am. and spent an hour doing what normally takes 10 minutes. I then left the shed and we are back to the top of the page.

I'm out of here in a bit and over to find the 'ex', then probably to the Starbucks, where I hope the wind is going to die down a bit because I want to sit in the sun and possibly take a 'power nap'.

Later I'll catch up with Jenn after her meeting and get a ride back to the gas station.

Later....Dave

P.S. Thanks Frayda, for the tip.

P.P.S. To whoever had stopped by the Starbucks one day last week asking for me, sorry I missed you, I just have not been frequenting it as much.

P.P.P.S. Sorry about the spacing of the paragraphs and the line breaks, sometimes this program gets a mind of it's own and won't let you correct it!!

The same with the occasional odd color change...not the ODD colors, that's me.....lol! I'm talking about unexpectedly within line or paragraph.

"This Too Shall Pass"...........OR.........."I Thought Toxic Gasses & Biological Weapons Were Outlawed By The Geneva Convention?".......

Good Morning;

I'm on my way over to Jenn's to do laundry, and make breakfast, (I found some really neat Bratwurst sausage from Johnsonville(?) that are made into large burger-like patties, (fresh and raw not the brown and serve kind), instead of the typical short fat links. A little honey mustard and a potato bread bun and I'm set to go! And of course I'm cooking them in beer because the grill is too dirty right now.

Then it is down to Monkee to congratulate her on becoming a grandmother for the second time..(that she knows of...lol!)..[which is occurring literally as I write this according to the phone call that just got cut short.....lol!], and to grab some meds.

Speaking of meds, my prescription was filled with absolutely no hassle yesterday at the RiteAid, from either the pharmacy or the M.A. verification people.....sign this, and this, and this...initial this, and this, and this, and out the door. That's a first!

I ended up sitting outside the Md. State Troopers Assn. office building and store, (embossed clothing, logo mugs and gifts, etc.), by the bus stop yesterday, in the little pocket park/plaza talking to 2 men from the neighborhood and sipping a beer...(the store was closed, and the offices were empty....lol). I had thought that these 2 guys, (a salt and pepper team), were homeless, from appearance and the fact that they are always sitting there in the park. One guy, (? name escapes me), always has a backpack and his dog Josie with him, and the other Jeff, usually has a bag or carry-all of some type. They are both nice enough guys and Jeff offered me a drink and asked if I ate today, or needed anything.

It turns out they both live down the street, one guy is on some type of disability and lives with his family, and the other owns 2 houses, one of which his ex-wife lives in, and is an ex-Marine and a present day drunk. It just goes to show that appearances can truly be deceiving.

The weather is a good deal warmer today and the threatened T-storms never showed...which is drag because I could have used the wind and the downpour to help rid the shed of a certain funky odor that is permeating the upper end where I sleep. It turns out that The peeping of baby birds that I thought I had heard for only 2 days and the scrabbling noise within the insulation between the walls or roof, and the subsequent absence of bird sounds and related noises was not my imagination. Seems that either some predatory animal ransacked the nest and feasted on some of the chicks and knocked others down into the gaps in the insulation, or the dumb birdies fell out themselves, unable to crawl out and eventually giving up the ghost to remain entombed in my abode! The recent warm weather and nice hot spring sunshine causes the wood of the shed to hold the heat, and as the little feathered corpses begin the process of mummification I am being treated to a host of interesting odors and smells as the fluids and internal organs desiccate and solidify. Oh Joy! I was also visited last night by a couple of those big black insects we used to call 'waterbugs', you know what I mean, the thumb sized roaches that don't run when you turn on the light, but kind of look at you like a 'wise guy' and make you have second thoughts about trying to hit them with the shoe in your hand!! I gently encouraged them to do an 'Elvis', and "leave the building", and rearranged some of the cardboard to extend out a few more inches to the walls, it won't keep them out, but maybe they'll be satisfied to stay below it, kind of , 'under the radar' as it is said....lol!

So when I was in the Giant i grabbed a can of the $1.00 air freshener and tonight I'll use that and my new fan until the smell finally dissipates.

It's just like when there is a mouse in a mousetrap that has gotten stuck out of reach behind the stove or in the wall, the stink will fade away and the critter will just be a dry little husk that one day you'll find the cat and the baby playing with.....lol!

Okay, gotta run, I may be back this afternoon, if not...see you Monday

...................Dave

"Back On The Track.............................."

Good Afternoon;

First to continue the train of thought that ran out of track when I had to run out yesterday;

So I helped Barry (RainMan) get the Wonton soup he was craving and talked with him about his situation and tried to get him to take advantage of the benefits HE can easily qualify for. I asked and he knows about Prologue and went down there to use the shower and the washer/dryer the other day when he came out of the ER in a set of disposable scrubs because the clothes he was wearing were infested with lice, (I knew there was a reason behind my intuitive tendency to keep few feet of space between us when we have talked and don't shake hands....lol), the infected sores and scratches and itching of same are what sent him to the ER in the first place, but refuses to accept their help in acquiring assistance from D.S.S or S.S.A., for some really confusing and incoherently illogical reasons. (The same results came up at the bus stop when I was talking to Donell, another homeless guy who frequents the library, and today in front of the Rite Aid when I went to drop off my prescriptions for refills, with yet another homeless man who frequents Pikesville and panhandles in the area. (Just Local FYI, Barry is white, and Donell and the other fellow whose name escapes me are black.; Also, for Local FYI there is a methadone clinic across from Prologue, so every morning there is an influx of outsiders to Pikesville, between them and some of the Developmentally challenged clients of Prologue who are bussed in each day for the day program, and have permission to leave the building. They look homeless but aren't, and leave either after getting their meth, or when the van leaves in the afternoon.)

Anyway, I tried to reach out, as a way to give back, but only hit 1 for 3....and that one was pretty much only a walk......lol.

I had to get to Jenn's last evening so they could get to Tom's homegroup and I watched the kids. I got a text after the meeting ended asking if I minded if they stopped for a bite to eat, since Devin had already crashed out and Edward was only a short way from dreamland, I said go ahead and then jumped in the shower. They brought me half a cheeseburger from Golden West Cafe in Hampden and said just stay the night, so I crashed on the couch. Between MickeyD's at lunchtime (with a sundae for dessert), and the burger they brought me and the bowl of oat squares cereal and milk, (even though it was Lactaid?!?)...I did not get must sleep last night. I ended up being awake when Jenn left at 4:45 am to go to the gym, and at 7:00 am. when she got back I was still awake. I walked up to the Giant and back and lay down about 8:00 am. and had just fallen back asleep when Devin woke up saw me, and began berating me for being such a sleepyhead and yelling at me to get up and let her out of 'baby jail'...lol!

After a very inactive morning and afternoon, I jumped in the shower again about 1:00 pm. and left about 2:30 pm. to drop off my refill, had the conversation with the big guy laying in the doorway by the RiteAid and came here. I guess I'm going to head over to the Starbucks, because I've nothing else to do tonight and no one to do it with if I did.

Tomorrow morning Jenn and Tom are going to the funeral of his 'little brother', and I'm stopping by and doing some laundry, ( it turns out that there was a full jug of laundry detergent there last Sunday when I bought another one...just not in it's usual place...lol), and shower......again..(hey I get them while I can!!).

I guess I'll be here sometime tomorrow afternoon, or maybe for a few minutes in the morning..... see you later..........................Dave

P.S. .....I've got minutes on both phones, if anybody else is at loose ends this weekend and wants to call me......D.

"Pennies From Heaven"...... OR ..... "Paying It Forward, Pays Me Back"

Good Afternoon;

So why do I always end up next to the weirdos and wackos here at the library? 4 possible computers open and I get assigned either next to the evil old witch who sneers under her breath at each and every other person who sits next to her, making racial and religious slurs..against the Yeshiva boys and she is Jewish herself...LOL), or to the strange woman who moves her bag of trash every time someone she does not like sits next to her...(which is about 89.9% of the population..lol)...and talks to herself, and herself, and herself...lol!

Anyway....I slept lousy again last night, it is one of those occasional bouts of lingering insomnia that afflict me every so often for no obvious reason. They are similar to the insomnia of withdrawal and are most likely due to the changes/damages in my brain from years of addiction. It may be years between occurrences, or a few weeks; and may last a few days or a couple weeks. I had set my alarm for 8:00 am. to get up and freshen up before I met Liz from Prologue at 9:00 am. I had just fallen back to sleep when it went off and I hit 'snooze' once, and the second time I disabled the alarm with the intention of getting up but fell back asleep until she called about 9:35 am. I told her I'd call her back in 10 minutes and let her know if I was coming down there or not. After I stood up and rolled up the blankets and the bag and put my shoes and shorts on, I walked outside and saw the bus coming around the corner so I jumped right on it. When I got to Prologue 5 minutes later Liz thought I was on the phone when the receptionist called to say I was there...lol. It was pretty funny and started our day together off well, as did the quick shave and the cup of coffee she brought me....not that she shaved me...they're a full service organization, but draw the line at some personal services...(LMAO!!!).

We went to WalMart on Rt. 40 and Rolling Road, and what a difference in selection and basic cleanliness and attitude from the Owings Mills store, (which is a real dump, surprisingly). I ended up with 2 pair of shorts, 2 real nice printed pocket tee-shirts, with designs that reflect my not so secret desire to be a sail boating, island hopping, beach bum fisherman and Jimmy Buffet wannabe....(except I can't sing or play an instrument worth sh*t...but.....details..details..details.....lol!). Also a great new bag, a box of D batteries, a rechargeable LED camp lantern, and a little portable, personal, battery operated or A/C adaptable fan. I have more new clothing than I have had in 20 years, even when I was working and in a house....lol!

I helped her pick out and air conditioner she was purchasing for one of her clients whose son has Asthma real bad, (this really is one great organization, they do all that is possible for their clients, and instead of just "saying no we can't" when difficulties arise with permission or clearances...they say "let's see how we can relabel, or reapply, or reword the request, or flex the rules and regulations in our favor".

I am really and truly grateful that Marybeth and Stu saw the stories and contacted me.

Last night I stopped by the dumpster and shared a donut feast with another homeless guy in Pikesville, his name is Barry and he is the one who I have called 'RainMan', from the Tom cruise movie of the same name.

I ended up giving him my bus tokens and a couple dollars so he could get some WonTon soup.

out of time....later......Dave

"A Cinqo De Mayo Soliloquy.................."

Overwhelmed and overloaded;

my emotional escalator
is descending dreamlike,
into the apathetic agony

and lingering lassitude

of longtime loneliness.

Hardened and hurting

my homeless heart hangs heavy,

isolated and insulated

by the ironic influence

of forgotten friends found

and newfound family.

Each exciting encounter

only exacerbates emptiness,

and delineates the distance

from hope to happiness

as dreams disintegrate

into impotent improbabilities.

Present possibilities

not promise nor projection,

fuel future fantasies

and mold mere memories

into visible victories,

and tangible triumphs.

Leaving a living legacy

to my children's children,

a life of loving laughter.

hiding hurt and heartache

from innocent inquisition,

& shielding shining souls

DBC 05/05/10

"Blues In The Night"...............OR.................."Nighttime Thinking-----Daytime Drinking"................"

Good Afternoon;

So I left here yesterday and went to the Starbucks for about 2 hours and sat out back on the patio reading, (I'm now reading 'Rama II', by Arthur C. Clarke and Gentry Lee, the sequel to Clarke's 'Rendezvous With Rama' which I finished yesterday), and listening to the Tuesday night 'Learning', or Torah commentary study, group of a young Orthodox Rabbi and 3 to 6 older men, who seem to be Modern Orthodox or Conservative by their dress and carriage. They meet every week at 8:00 pm. and usually sit inside near the rear door, obstructing access to patrons and also to the employees who are in the process of cleaning up and constantly running bags of trash and boxes out to the trash cans, they are also blocking the fire exit. After observing them for about the past 6 months or more, and watching the same actions and reactions every week, half a dozen times or more a night....I just have to say, there does not seem to be much in the way of 'learning', as regards common sense and good manners. (And let's not forget that most weeks they have to be told that the store will be closing in a few minutes, and of course it holds up the folks trying to lock up as they gather their belongings).

I'm just saying, even lab rats pick things up after the first few experiences....lol!

Anyway, I left their in time to catch the #58 bus to the Plaza Metro station and it was my favorite driver, not only one of the most beautiful young women I've ever met, but also one of the most down to earth, friendliest, openest a, kindest and courteous ladies I know. She is just an all around nice person who exemplifies the phrase "Sunny Disposition". We chatted awhile before she had to make her last run and I then sat and read waiting for the #59 bus up to the shed.

Now this driver was an example of most of the MTA drivers, distantly polite...or is it politely distant..lol., and only partially observant of the traffic laws..(Basically, only when it suited his convenience)..nothing blatantly in violation of the safety of the passengers or others, like the driver I had leaving the library yesterday. HE was one of the drivers who is not only surly and obstructionist, but also recklessly endangers both passengers and other motorists. For example, cruising down Reisterstowm Rd. thru Pikesville at 50 MPH, jackrabbit starts with elderly and disabled people still finding their seats, and neither pulling in to the curb nor lowering the bus to allow people to get on and off safely and easily.

Anyway, I stopped at the gas station and found a free promotional coupon for $5.00 on the "Packaged 'Keno To Go'.." ($00.25 per game instead of $1.00, and the payouts per game are correspondingly only 25%, and tickets must be purchased in $5.00 = 20 game increments...thus the 'Package"........Think the state is preparing for slots?....lol!). I ended up winning 3 games out of 20 for $1.50....and I watched another 10 games as I talked with Daniel, the Kenyan attendant, about his home and his language and his tribe, and about a SF writer, Michael D. Resnick who has become fascinated and appreciative of the Kikuyu people and has written about them in African settings and context, and has some SF stories that combine the traditional tribal lifestyle, customs, rites, and beliefs and future universes and space travel..(it may sound weird but it truly works).

I had real trouble sleeping last night, my mind and emotions overwhelmed and overloaded by all the recent contacts and events, and by something which happened to my son-in-law last week.

{In brief, he had taken someone very close to him, someone he considered his 'little brother' in a sense to a meeting at his homegroup Thursday night, and had dropped him off at his house afterwards. It seems that some time later that night or the next morning, the young man took his own life,leaving lots of notes for everyone. That weekend if you remember Tom and Jenn took the kids to see their Grandmother, (my mom), in Dover. Jenn found out about this early Sunday morning and had to sit on it, keeping it all inside as much as possible until they stopped at Tom's mom's house, (and she was the godmother of this poor tormented guy), so she could break the news in a 'safer' environment, and without a 2 hour drive home. It must have been hell for all three of them}

Well, with all the sudden reconnection's and new family connections and thoughts of past, present, and future generations, and my own mortality; plus having gone through the exact same experience as Tom, too damn many times during my deep involvement with NA, (and still now once in a while finding out that someone who seemed to have 'got it', just could not go on anymore......), not to mention my own travels to the edge, and luckily back again....... It is no wonder that my head was filled with strange thoughts and ponderings, and my emotions were teetering on the brink of stability. (And I'm not even going into the phantasmagorias of dreamland that I stumbled through when I did snatch some sleep...Oy Vey!...let me just tell you that reading a bunch of 'Steampunk' stories and a lot of works touching on the kabbalistic theme of the 'golem'...you would not want to be wandering through my mind alone on a dark, foggy night!....LOL!)

Anyway, the birds are back, after a weeks reprieve, and with a vengeance thay made up for lost time with insane fighting within the walls and ceiling. I started beating on the insulation until I hit moving, squawking lumps and finally scared the crap out of them for a few hours worth of rest. I ended up wandering the Giant in a daze before I decided on what to get for lunch, and ended up not paying attention and grabbing the wrong can of fruit without the pop top lid....oy!!!

I walked over to the liquor store for the makings of a cocktail, and made one!

I sat outside the library with a couple of the librarians and are and read and talked until after Noon, and here I am!

Out Of Time

Later...Dave

"Young Love.........First Love"................................"Maybe No Longer A Flame..............But The Spark Never Dies..............."

Good Afternoon;

So I ended up at Starbucks last night because it was too warm to sit outside and I had nowhere else to go. I met Jenn and got a ride back to the Giant, where I grabbed a bottle of juice and then sat outside on the bench at First Watch reading until almost 1:00 am. (with a visit to the gas station for the bathroom and the Keno...lol), that looks like it's going to be my primary late night, warm dry weather spot to read before retiring to 'Abandoned Acres', since the Mt. Washington Starbucks is not conducive to after hours clientele, and the St. Thomas one still has no tables outside...(at last look).

I got up today and puttered around the Giant looking for bargains for a meal this morning, (Phillips Crab and Shrimp Salad, about 1/2 lb., on sale for $2.35, with a $2.00 off sticker, In Store Bakery Biscuits, 4 @ $1.99, with a $1.50 off sticker, Butterball Deep Fried Thanksgiving Style Deli-Sliced Turkey Breast, on sale for $2.50 a tub, with a $2.00 off sticker)..[anybody who says they are hungry and begging for money, ain't telling you the 'Rest Of The Story' as Paul Harvey used to say]

I sat outside the library for a couple hours and ate and finished my book, until the sun shifted around the building and I lost the shade. It is a lovely day out, why the heck have I wasted so much of it in here on the computer?...LOL!

Well, I'll tell you..I opened my e-mail, and lo and behold in my junk mail folder I see this phrase in the Subject: box that gave me pause, only one person would have any inkling what the hell it meant, and the name in the From: box matched it!

I marked it as 'safe' and transferred it to my Inbox while I answered and wrote some other e-mails, and did some searching on Google and looked at my Facebook account, and so on, and so on....

Yeah I was very nervous and apprehensive about opening this e-mail and stalled for a long while, until my curiosity outweighed my anxiety. I have had no contact with this person for over 20 years, and often wanted to try to contact her but did not for the same reasons I avoided most of the folks I was close to before I began my long, out of control, high speed run down the 'powdery' slopes of the soul eating of the deadly slalom of addiction.

I finally did open it and it was HER, my very first girlfriend, from 1973. Again the JT story caused a parent, her mother, to call a child and exclaim.."Did You See Who Is On The Cover....?"....lol!

I lost contact with Patti sometime just before I had my car accident, (Dec. 20-21?...[one side of midnight or the other...I don't remember exactly, being in a coma and all that...lol!]...1990).

Well she was amazed to see the article and read the blog and we are going to meet when she returns from vacationing and visiting her sister and mother in Florida.

I am overwhelmed with memory and emotion, and a lot of laughter too, we had some fun and silly times together. I am riding the pendulum back and forth between anticipation and apprehension as I anxiously await our reunion.

She was not only my first girlfriend, but the first female with whom I became and stayed friends with, paving the way for many future friendships with other women, (and also men), on a truly 'person to person' basis, over and above, or is it above and beyond, sex, gender, and/or orientation or lifestyle. Funny thing about this situation is that she also knew my best and oldest and in continous contact friend Anna Marie before I met her...small world!

Anyway, I am out of here again, with no place to go or be, and later than I wanted to leave. I'll probably kill the next few hours on the bus to, at ond back from the Starbucks.

Bye now....Dave

"Freedom FROM Religion........A First Amendment Right!!..............."

Good Afternoon;

I just finished watching the documentary "Jesus Camp", (made in 2006, during the course of the hearing to confirm Justice Alito to the Supreme Court), DAMN!!!!

Talk about scary, I used to worry about the way the Ultra Orthodox Jewish schools indoctrinate the kids in religion at the expense of secular subjects at times, but seeing how the Evangelical Christians brainwash their kids with religion to achieve and promote a political agenda, I realize that at least we Jews are teaching the children the word as it is written..and how it relates and affects to us!!.. not as a method of inculcating our beliefs...(and I use the word 'our' with a grain of salt when referring to my religiosity as compared to my own spirituality)...on others and programming them to disseminate said opinions and propaganda.

The methods used are nothing less than brainwashing of impressionable children. These kids are as young as 4 or 5 years old and range up to about 12.

The only thing scarier than the kids are the parents and the 'children's pastor'.

Watching the methods used and the reasons stated for the conditioning needed, one can easily see the not so hidden agenda of these people,...to eliminate any and all opposing beliefs and ultimately to eliminate democracy and instate a theocracy, with them as the 'deciders'....(sound familiar? see the footnote during the section on Ted Haggard and the Colorado Springs area megachurches!)....bringing about 'heaven on earth' and their version of the way things should be.

You really should check this DVD out.

This has been an UNPAID political editorial, (and if I offended you, you probably should not be reading me anyway....lol!)

later...........................Dave

"Don't You Dare.......You'll Put Your Eye out.............."

Good Afternoon Again;

I wanted to add this one thing before I leave the library today...(if I ever do get out of here...LOL)...

Harriet told me something today as we were leaving the restaurant today that is getting to be a commom theme and a running gag everytime I end up meeting a new person, (99.9% of the time it has been a woman saying this), mainly some variation of "

"My..(insert proper male relation, ie.; husband, father, son, brother, friend, uncle...etc.)..told me> not to do this/ that I'm crazy to do this",

This being....'meet me'!

And in every case I have ended up bonding in some way and initiating a new friendship, maybe not one where I see the person regularly, but one where something 'clicked' between us, open up new levels and possibilities to explore.

Some of the naysayers pre-formed their opinions and prejudices from either one or both of the articles in the JT or BM, focusing on my past history of addiction and prison, and some from the blog and the general stigma of my being homeless. It has gotten to the point that I can tell what is coming next when people slip into their slightly guilty confesssional mode and begin to, sometimes awkwardly and embarrassed, admit thatn they almost listened to others, Or, on the other side of the coin, ironically acknowledge the absurdity and humor of their apprehensions brought on by other's forebodings.

I can actually understand and appreciate some of the fears and cautionary feelings that would arise in some folks, Hell I would not meet me in a secluded place alone if that was what the invitation amounted to, but every first meeting has been and will be in a well traveled and lighted public place.

(For my safety and peace of mind as well as theirs...lol!)

In any case i just want to extend my thanks and gratitude to those who chose, (and choose), to meet me.

Thank you for enriching my life with your entry into my world, and for all those who decided to show their interest and concern in a material way also, with much appreciation and humility I am grateful for your compassion, and I try to continue the chain as I go on.

Times up.........................dave

"They Made Me...................................... 'An Offer I Couldn't Refuse'..................."

Good Afternoon;

So I just got back from lunch with "My Cousin Harriet",

She drove us out to T.G.I. Fridays and she was kind and generous enough to treat.

(I had the 'Sicilian Chicken Sandwich' and a glass of ice water)

We had a very nice chat exchanging family information on our present and recent family members, and I was able to supply some information and answer some questions about her grandfather, who is also my grandfather, but who was married and had left his wife, [HER grandmother] (and children), before he married MY grandmother, (sometime between 1912 and 1919). This was not the type of thing that was talked about in those days, so although there were rumors, there was no solid evidence. It's a bit bizarre...(and what aspect of my life isn't...LOL!)...that the man she knew as her grandfather, who was actually her step-grandfather, had his funeral the same day as my, (her actual), grandfather. Also the families of the second generation grew up sometimes within steps of one another in the same neighborhoods with no knowledge of one another! She is 10 years older than I am, and we have the same memories of certain places either from the distance of age, or the distance of time. As I said earlier, and it is really is a moral imperative, accentuated and accelerated by mortality, we plan to continue to meet and get to know one another..."better late than never"...has never been more aptly applied!

This is the 6th the major contact from the Jewish Times article, and like those old late night ads for 'record clubs'....( a record is to a CD what an e-mail is to a letter kids)....used to say..."And The Hits Just Keep On Coming"!!!..........LOL!

I'm out of time again...............later............................Dave

"By The Numbers......................."

Good Morning;

Well, today is 05/03/10. My BP is 152/90. The time is 11:47 am. The temperature is 79.7 degrees F., with a heat index of 82 degrees F., the humidity is 64% and the dew point is 66 degrees F., with the barometer at 29.77 in./hg and falling, with a 60% chance of thunderstorms. In the past 72 hours I have gotten 10 hours of sleep. My irritability factor is hovering around 80 while my patience/tolerance level is down to near 30. I have $23.25 in my pocket, (& 1 bus token). There are 104.72 mimutes left on one phone and 47.88 left on the other.

Okay, more than you ever wanted to know right....lol.

After I got back to Jenn's on Saturday afternoon I went to wash clothes, but there was no detergent and it was too damn hot and humid to go back outside, so I sat down with the cable and the remote and the refrigerator until about 9:00 pm. when the upstairs neighbor stumbled home and cranked up the stereo and the bass, (this is a different apt. from the morning), I was both ticked off and feeling aggressive enough to respond to the lack of consideration and courtesy, (and this is a continuing issue with them), and since it was before 11:00 pm and I could not call the cops, that I put the Pink Floyd 'Dark Side Of The Moon' CD in the player and cranked up the volume and the bass to "11", and then jumped in the shower for a nice, long, relaxing soak. (If you remember, this album has the heartbeat that increases in volume, and the alarm clocks, and the lovely bass line throughout) Well, when I got out of the shower 40 minutes later as the album was ending, the noise from upstairs had been cranked down to merely annoying. For the rest if the night everytime it went back to rattling the windows or the things in the cabinets, I chose a well thought out selection of good old classic rock, ("Iron Man" was a big hit as was the drum solo from "In A Gadda Da Vita")!

Okay my cousin Harriet is here and we are going to lunch now.

I may be back later today....................Dave

"Rants In My Pants.................................."

Good Afternoon;

Yesterday, Rachel and I walked to Mickey D's after leaving here, and Liz said she saw us walking down Reisterstown Rd.

So I made it out of Jenn's apartment and to the library today anyway.

There are a couple of reasons for this, first when Rachel's mom picked her up this morning she had five library books that Rachel and I had checked out last month that were due today, and I volunteered to drop them off, (again for a couple reasons..1- They are on my card and I wanted to be sure they made it back today, 2- She was heading in the other direction and was a bit late as it was, and we are not arguing over anything at the moment, so I decided to be a nice guy and help her out, [she has enough to deal with at the moment, the roofer came to repair the leak over Rachel's room, {and only 2 years after I pointed it out to her!!!}, and somehow in the process caused the roof to leak over Her bedroom, collapsing the ceiling...AND the dining room ceiling below it! Thanks to renters insurance, they are in a hotel...With a Pool, Rachel is on a vacation...lol], 3- I want to get a cold six pack, and 4- the next door neighbor's, (who happens to be the maintenance man at the complex), stepkids are blasting Reggae with the bass turned way, way up and it was a case of the least aggravation to just split for a bit and hope Eddie get's off work before I get back, letting him ream their asses, instead of me doing it.

And now, here we go again off we go into the wild and wooly land of the tangential rant.......

What is with all these morons who are wearing there pants belted across their thighs with buckle at the level of their dick and their asses hanging over their belts like a buffalo that tried to jump a barbed wire fence and got caught up halfway over? Now that it's getting hot they are wearing those stupid baggy 'not pants' but 'not shorts' trousers that look like typical Great Depression era Okie wear...(hmmmm..."OKIE WEAR"....these idiots will buy anything some big name rapper will wear, now who can I enlist to be my partner...someone either too dumb to get the joke...or $avvy enough to!..)....but the part that really gets to me is the stupidity and ignorance demonstrated by the evidence of their ill-mannered and constant spitting. EVERYWHERE!!! On the bus stops, at the subway and light rail, and not just on the platforms, but on the trains!, and I've seen them do it on the buses too!?!? It is not just blacks but also those confused and pitiful white folk who embrace ghetto culture and prison style and think it makes them cool!?

Yeah, right.

There is not one of them who would not gain IQ points by being lobotomized!

At least it would quiet them down if done right by giving the speech center a little jiggle with the old pointy coat hanger while the doc is in there stirring away. I mean, what kind of communication can there be when every other word is 'Yo', (used as a adverb, adjective, noun, and proper noun), or 'Bitch', (sometimes as term of endearment for the significant other...or more frequently the 'baby mama' or 'baby daddy' or 'F*ck', (again with multiple usage in all tenses, including as a verb, some times prefaced with 'Mother'), or 'Ho'..(see Bitch). I hate riding the bus with Rachel just because it is hard to explain the ignorance and crudity to some one not yet 6 years old ..WHO KNOWS BETTER!!!

Hey I am no angel, I curse, (or cuss if you prefer), but it is to show extreme emotion, or accentuate a point, or express pain or shock or awe or amazement, not every other word. And it is not the words themselves, they have basically been diluted, denatured, and neutered....it is the attitude toward ignorance, casual cruelty and lack of common decency, respect and manners.

If President Obama really wants to start a 'dialogue' on race in America...this is a damn fine place to start.

Act like an animal, get treated like an animal.

At the level I see these actions it reflects the people I see every day, on the street, on public transit, and at the facilities serving the homeless. What is so sad is that the same words, deeds, actions and attitudes are reflected and duplicated by the drivers and operators of the vehicles and the majority of government and bureaucratic civil servants who interact with these people. Monkey See, Monkey Do.

For proof, see the case of the child in a Baltimore City school who was bullied to the point of attempting suicide. The children, (if that is the term one can use for the little bastards), who bullied and tortured this poor girl who is different because of the way she walks due to Cerebral Palsy, and a third grader only 8 years old, learn this at home from the partents and older siblings. The whole ghetto/rap attitude of kindness is weakness, a twisted and perverted inner city version of the jungle's 'eat the weak', permeates the streets, the homes, and the schools. Add in the attitude so prevalent in government and business, of, 'I gots mine!', and the whole 'stop snitching' culture, where the guards and inmates are friends and neighbors, if not relatives, and it is no wonder prison more`s are in the homes, on the streets, and the schools.

Okay, I'm done for now, and no apologies this time.

(The next one's near the point of eruption too, so stay tuned. I'll give you a hint... Who drives in flagrant disregard for the traffic laws, and yet is never pulled over? Who is federally prohibited from texting and talking while driving, yet some still do, and who carries on conversations with friends standing next to them blocking the narrowest point of the aisle, (at times turning their heads to look at them)? You got it, MTA drivers,...rudeness for the ride, and manners to match!)

Well I feel a bit better anyway....lol! I'm out of here for now, I'm going back to Jenn's where it's not as cool as the library, but not as hot as the shed. By Sunday night, unless we get a thunderstorm it will be a sauna...literally! damp wood baking in the sun and extreme heat.

I'm making a detour past the beer store, any requests? Nothing too extravagant please. I got my Safelink minutes on the phone this morning,

(the 410-340-XXXX #) ,if anyone tries to call. I'm still looking for some company for this evening...I'll even let you hold the remote or choose the DVD for the surround sound system..(sorry no BluRay....lol)! And I made Bowtie Pasta with Shrimp, Chicken, Mild Italian Sausage, and Fresh Grape Tomatoes in a light Crab based cream sauce, with some shredded Mozzarella to melt over it.

Yummmmm!

Okay, see you Monday if you don't show up!

(Library Closed On Sundays Now)

Later..............Dave