Monday, April 15, 2013

"..........“I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I'm awake, you know?” ― Ernest Hemingway..........."

Good Evening;
So....I'm still here at Jenn's after cancelling today's appointment's at HCH. At 5:00 am I had gotten about 25 minutes sleep total for the night and was shivering and could not get warm, and my feet and lower legs were numb/tingling-cold/burning-cramped/throbbing all at once. There was no way I was going to be showered, packed and ready to go in the 30 -45 minutes left before Tom would be leaving to go to work in Hampden. I called and left messages cancelling my appointments and crawled into the recliner and wrapped up and shivered in and out of a shallow sleep until my grandson went to school at 9:00 am., than crawled into his bed and piled on the quilts until I got warm...or nearly so. I finally fell into a period of solid sleep at 11:00 am. until 1:00 pm. and woke up warm enough but still feeling like 2 bags of dead mice. I'm staying here again tonight and tomorrow morning and riding back into Baltimore with Jenn's cousin Sydney who's living here in the attic and who works at the Mt. Washington Tavern. I cancelled the appointment with the psych nurse tomorrow too, because I won't be getting into town until after the scheduled time of the appointment, and because my only other transportation option would be again at 5:30 am..... and I plan to be in deep R.E.M. sleep then.... one way or another. Last night even Melatonin and Vistaril were of little help. Tonight I'm going to adjust the dosage times according to some research into the metabolization rates and also the reaction times and it's efficacy in combination with my buprenorphine.... as the saying goes... "timing is everything".

I'll see you tomorrow with the after-action reports....
“Oh God, midnight’s not bad, you wake and go back to sleep, one or two’s not bad, you toss but sleep again. Five or six in the morning, there’s hope, for dawn’s just under the horizon. But three, now, Christ, three A.M.! Doctors say the body’s at low tide then. The soul is out. The blood moves slow. You’re the nearest to dead you’ll ever be save dying. Sleep is a patch of death, but three in the morn, full wide-eyed staring, is living death! You dream with your eyes open. God, if you had strength to rouse up, you’d slaughter your half-dreams with buckshot! But no, you lie pinned to a deep well-bottom that’s burned dry. The moon rolls by to look at you down there, with its idiot face. It’s a long way back to sunset, a far way on to dawn, so you summon all the fool things of your life, the stupid lovely things done with people known so very well who are now so very dead – And wasn’t it true, had he read somewhere, more people in hospitals die at 3 A.M. than at any other time...” 
― Ray BradburySomething Wicked This Way Comes

Later...............................Dave

1 comment:

elana r. snyder said...

as u can c from my blog i have been awake for 10.5 weeks, so the quote on sleep is very fitting for my circumstances!