"Home Court Advantage...................."

Good Afternoon;

So, I went over Jenn's after I left the library yesterday, did my laundry and fed the kids and with difficulty, refrained from place kicking Edward into next week.

Well after another achey night of too little restful sleep and too much nervous tension and stress over today's court appearance, that manifested itself in knotted muscles and jangly hyper-sensitive nerve endings, exacerbated by my ride being a few minutes late and then unexpectedly heavy traffic on a route that had next to none last trip.......I made it to the courthouse.

After conferring with the public defenders assistant in the hallway, the public defender at desk in the court room, and then with the State's representative in the court room....I was handed a new summons for January 11, 2011 and signed a release for medical information and returned to my seat. We watched and listened to Judge Mickey Norman deal with other cases with appropriate dashes of fairness, humor, sterness, and a large sprinkling of panache. About 11:30 am. I was called to the defense table and after the State and PD attorneys told the judge about the continuance, he asked if I had received a summons and I was dismissed.

By good fortune I already have an appointment with my doctor at JAI on Monday the 11th, so I'll be able to initiate MY request for copies of the medical information also. Plus I have 3 months to try to locate all the MRI, CT, XRAY films and analyses that I have stored away somewhere and to try to contact other, previous physicians who may have pertinent records.

As the saying goes..."If you want to fight on equal footing with bureaucrats....bury 'em in paperwork!"

I've got to find out when Jenn will be home and go and get my bags, and see if she wants to have me cook dinner there. I also want to try the chicken soup she had simmering on the stove for most of the day and night yesterday!

Depending on what time I get out of there, this afternoon or this evening, it's either back to the shed or possibly the coffee shop then the shed.

Be it ever so crumble(ly)......it's still better sleeping there for my back sometimes!

I'll see you later..........Dave

"Hot And Cold Running Tension.........."

Good Morning;

It's cool and grey outside today, a bit below normal temps for this time of the season, but a nice change from the 90+ temps we had this summer. It is also refreshing to get out after being in Jenn's apartment since yesterday afternoon. Both of the grandkids are sick and/or suffering the effects of allergies so the windows have been shut, the stinky dog needs a bath and the heat came on last night for the first time since last spring, which always has an unpleasant odor for a while until the accumulated dust, crud and mouse poop, (and sometimes baby mice), burns off. The greyness suits my mood today as tomorrow's court date creeps ever nearer, minute by interminable minute, as I experienced last night, unable to either sleep, get comfortable or stop worrying all night long. Then as dawn approached and I finally began to drop off....Tom's alarm goes off...playing Metallica at full volume! Then it's time for Jenn to get Edward up for school and that 3 ring circus begins.

Trying to sleep I alternated between the sagging sectional couch rejected by the Taliban as a torture device because it was too cruel, and the leather recliner, and back again. I think I am going to get back to the doctor because not only is the spinal pain from the degenerative disc disease increasing to the point that a decrease in the interval between meds indicated, and the neuropathy from the pneumo-thoracotomy becoming both acute and chronic, but I think I am having sciatic nerve issues also in my left lower back and down through my left leg....Happy, happy, joy, joy.....just what I need.

I had to get out of the house for a couple reasons this morning, the above mentioned stuffiness, to get to the computer here at the library, and the inter-familial tension that was becoming thick enough to cut with a knife....and then be able to spread it in a slice of bread! There was a lot of 'pot calling the kettle black' going on and I wanted to leave before I was tempted to open my mouth and insert my divergent opinions on child rearing and intra-marital relations.

It would end up a 3-way cage match between Pot, Kettle.........and Dutch Oven!......LOL!!!

I'm trying to reach my caseworker from Prologue to see if she is still going to accompany me to court tomorrow. I'll be leaving here in about 10 minutes and heading back to Jenn's to watch devin while she goes to pick Ed up from school. This afternoon and evening I will be watching one then both kids while Ed has soccer and Tom and Jenn are shuttling and shuffling around town and then heading out to Monkton to his Aunt's viewing and services. It's been a hectic couple of days and the stress on everyone is very close to the surface and the breaking point.

I hope to be back tomorrow, but if I'm not, thanks for reading and hopefully enjoying my writings and ramblings. There have been 8,121 visits as of today, and 28 of you 'loyal readers' have signed on as 'Follwers', (and that and $1.49 will get you a tall cup of coffee at Starbucks..[if you bring your own mug!]..LOL!).

It has been almost 2 years, that's about the longest I've ever stuck with anything, (anything legal and non-selfdestructive that is....lol), and I have your continuing return to credit that to.

Later.....

.................Dave

Insane.......Rain.......&.........Pain......................"

Good Afternoon;

First check out this link to youtube about an Orlando Fla. man arrested for feeding the homeless:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lyivZI2skEI&deature=player_embedded

It's a really f*cked up world out here sometimes when as the Brits call it you are a "rough sleeper"!

(Thank you Michelle M. for the link, and for the late night text session yesterday.)

So, Sunday I ended up going to the coffee shop to get out of the rain for a couple hours after I closed the library at 5:00 pm., I caught another negligent bus driver on the #58 line disregarding conditions and speeding on wet roads and driving with one hand while the other arm was hanging in the loop of the cord of the emergency phone/radio of the bus, as she yelled and cursed at other drivers or sang to herself. She was slamming on the brakes and pulling off with jackrabbit starts and whipping around corners too fast and wide, and...while a disabled passenger was trying to pay his fare and then get to his seat she was not giving him any time to hold on but jerked away and then slammed to a stop causing him to slip and fall into the seat sideways. Enough is enough!

This bitch got reported on Monday and a formal complaint is being filed!!!

I left the coffee shop at 8:00 pm. when it closed, (and got another bus driver who ignored the speed limits on dark, narrow, & wet roads...and a second two who were the model of what a driver should be, NOT ALL of them are assholes, but the ones who are seem to overshadow the good ones), and made it back to the shed before 9:00 pm. It began to rain as I lay down and did so steadily all night long and most of the morning. I had a bad night so I was up and down the whole time. My back and my side have been acting up something awful, and the dampness does not help. I got up and out about 11:00 am. when the rain let up some and got dressed....(and I had to wear long pants!!!, it should not be that cold yet!!)....and went to the library....WHERE THE COMPUTERS WERE DOWN!!.... AARRGGHHH!! I hung around for an hour or so waiting to see if they would come back up, (they did not), and tried to text or call someone to go out and have a drink and lunch with, but got no responses, only voice mail boxes.

I really wanted some company, the type of camaraderie that you get in a small local pub/bar/cafe. I remembered a little place on Falls Road in Mt. Washington,(and why is it called 'Mount' if most of it is in a river valley?...lol), near the Starbucks called the "Curb Stop" that seemed to be a nice little place and not some dive. I stopped in there and had a couple drinks and a beer and a burger and talked with some of the regulars coming in at happy hour. It was a decent place with a comfortable atmosphere, I'd go back there...BUT....(and I gotta admit I screwed up here, if I'm going to be honest and if I list the good things I've got list my mistakes too), I'll not order a mixed drink there again! From seeing the signs of happy hour specials and beer specials and food specials I thought that cocktails would be in the same very reasonable range.....NOT!!! 3 bourbon and Sprites cost me $15.33!!! and the beer was $2.50...for a pint! The burger was fresh and hand made and the fries were steak fries cooked in clean oil and both were priced within reason. I spent much more than I wanted to and should have, though not more than I had, thank goodness. S0 I'm down to $5.00 in cash way too early this month, but the bus pass, phone, and meds are in good shape, and I get my Stamps on the 7th, (the same day I go to court), and I am spending the next 2 nights at Jenn's babysitting because they have another family funeral to deal with. (It has been a really rough year for my son in law Tom between his Dad, and aunts and uncles, and close friends passing....it is seeing the pain in others lives that helps keep me in perspective.)

I've got to leave for Jenn's now...I'm late...

Later....................Dave

"MTA Madness...........&............No Good Deed Goes Unpunished..............."

Good Afternoon;

Yay Fall!!!

The Pikesville library is back open on Sundays!

When I left here yesterday morning I headed over to Monkee's and began the first ride in what became a constant continuation from the night before, (Friday), of the incompetency, ignorance, and idiocy of the MTA. The driver of the #59 bus saw me in the middle of the street waiting for one car to pass by so I could finish crossing and board the bus, (which was 5 minutes ahead of schedule, so lateness was not an issue), I waved at the driver, asked her to wait, (and we were less than 15 feet away and her window was open),...she saw and heard me, and stared right at me, as she pulled out.....into the right of way of the oncoming car, causing it to slam on it's brakes and swerve across the center lines of the road!

There was another bus coming up the opposite way so I took it to the Old Ct. Subway station and I caught the train down to Johns Hopkins and the #13 bus, (one run of which did not show up, and the other one was 30 minutes off schedule), to Monkee's. We talked and I got my meds for the next 3 weeks and she ended up seeing me stilllllll! on the bus stop when she was passing by and gave me a ride to the Johns Hopkins Subway where I caught the train back up to Old Ct. Station, where the 3:44 pm. #53 bus was pulling off 5 minutes early and the driver was consciously ignoring the people running towards it from the train, (but the ignorant waste of oxygen stopped in the middle of the roadway to block traffic and talk with the driver on the incoming #77 bus). The 4:00 pm bus never showed up, but at 4:20 pm. an unscheduled run arrived, that was only going halfway through the route, and as it was pulling out Another! #53 showed up. I got back to the library about 4:35 pm. and was here until 5:10 pm., just before closing time at 5:30 pm. I never went to the Starbucks because I was going over Jenn's house around 5:45 pm. to arrive as they were leaving and be able to shower and do laundry and just hang out. I ended up leaving around 12:20 am. to be able to catch the last #59 bus back up to the shed. Jenn's apt. is within sight of the bus stop and less than 5 minutes away from the Plaza Subway station where the run originates.....You can guess what happened right? The bus never showed, the run was dropped for some unknown reason with no notice, stranding a sh*tload of angry people who got off the last train and who count on the bus...which is the only public transportation, (road), available between Pikesville and Owings Mills. I waited until close to 1:00 am. and then walked up to Reisterstown Rd., (which was in sight of where I waited for the #59, and while I was walking), to catch the 1:00 am. #53...which....yep, right again...NEVER SHOWED!!! I was texting Jenn who had just gotten home and she said come back and sleep on the couch. I wanted to give her and her husband some needed alone time, (the kids were at her mom's), and I also did not want to walk all the way back with my bags, filled with nearly all my laundry, 2 bottles of Powerade and 1 of water, and assorted other weighty things. There was an minor auto accident that had happened right in front of me that was entertaining me also so I said I'd wait until the next, (which was also the last), #53 bus at 2:03 am.

I mean there could not be 3 buses in a row up a major street which did not show...right?

WRONG!!!! I waited until 2:30 am. and tried to text Jenn and Tom back, but got no reply, and I did not want to wake them up, or 'ahem'..."interrupt" them....lol! if that was the case, so, I started walking. It is only a 2 mile or so walk which I normally would think nothing of, and the air was cool, almost cold with my shorts and tee shirt on...but, the shape my back is in now combined with the weight and awkwardness of the bags I was carrying made it an hour and twenty minute trek.

I am very sore right now.

I got to sleep about 4:00 am., woke once at 7:00 am. to water the trees, and fell back asleep until I heard car door slamming and voices close by. There was some sort of party about to happen at the hall next door and folks were moving all around. I dozed in and out until 2:00 pm. and then tried to slip out unnoticed.....I am not sure if it worked.

The computer is about shut off..........

See you Tomorrow.

..Dave

" Dumpster Dave's Carpet Fair.....If You Don't Shop Here......'You're Making A Big Mistake!'...."

Good Morning;

And a beautiful morning it is too!

Last night was great sleeping weather, I was in the sleeping bag and zipped it up for the first time since last spring. At some point last night I woke up and my toes were actually chilly..........lol! I put on fresh clean socks and went back to sleep.

I went to the coffee shop after I left here yesterday and checked out the area dor signs of flood damage. The water did not seem to have reached any of the buildings that I could see. I left there at closing and waited and waited and waited for the #58 bus which did not show, I think the newest driver on this route is pulling in and pulling out 10 to 12 minutes early and not waiting until the scheduled time of 10 minutes after the hour, (it is the same time on every evening run except fot the 7:15 pm. trip), so I jumped on the #27 bus and then we had to wait on Belvedere Avenue between Park Heights Ave. and Reisterstown Rd. while this old drunken junkie idiot argues and fussed with the bus driver, spilling his damn beer and falling down all over the place before he was 'gently convinced' to leave the bus by some of the passengers. All the buses were messed up and out of sync last night. Whether it was the MTA or the drivers I'm not sure, but it was a mess. I got back to Pikesville just before 11:00 pm. and stopped in the Giant for a bottle of Powerade that I had found a coupon for.

As I was leaving and going past the dumpsters near First Watch Cafe I noticed that the upscale liquor store must have gotten a huge shipment of wines in that day because of all the boxes. I took advantage of this by grabbing a dozen or so of the sturdiest boxes, most with a high gloss finish for that little extra bit of water resistance...lol...and re-carpeted the foyer and the main hallway, (LOL!), of the shed. The old flooring which I just replaced a week or two ago was completely overwhelmed and waterlogged due to the massive influx of rainwater from the storm and starting to dissolve back into a pulpy mess, kinda like bran flakes that you are about to eat for breakfast when the phone rings and you forget about them for an hour and when you get back to them they have absorbed all the milk and using the sugar sprinkled on them have transmogrified themselves into a paste-like alien life form that refuses to surrender the spoon you left in the bowl.

Yeah, well....when my sneaker became mired in the muck.....I decided it was time for new 'carpet'.

I bagged all the old cardboard and took it to a dumpster then went to the gas station to wash up. I found a dollar on the parking lot and tried my luck at the Keno for the first time in weeks.....and it is still on hiatus. I wanted something to snack on so I went to the 'Dunkin Dumpster' and grabbed a 'chocolate iced bagel twist' ?!?!? NOT! one of their better ideas....LOL! It not only looked like a dog's rawhide chew toy, it had the texture and taste of one also....but WTF, I guess you can coat anything with chocolate swirls and some idiot will buy it....LOL!

I was not sleepy yet so I watched the pilot and the first regular episode of the SF channel's space opera series "Firefly" until about 2:00 am. and then went to sleep. I woke up about 7:00 am. to pee, fell back asleep, and got up at 9:00 am. I ended up talking and wandering around the Giant for an hour, getting something for breakfast, (which I have yet to eat....lol), and getting my cash off the card in 3 transactions at the register because I can't use it at an ATM due to a faulty magnetic strip....and there is $5.00 charge...to me!!...to get a new card even though the damage is not my fault and occurred while the card was in the possession of one of the caseworkers at D.S.S. who placed it on or near something that wiped part of the data off the strip. So here I am now about to head out on my rounds and get my monthly bus pass, and put some money/minutes on my Virgin Mobile phone before I lose service and the number for good, and to head over towards Hopkins and pick up my meds, then I have to stop and see Monkee, and.....most likely end up at the Starbucks later. The grand-monsters are at Jenn's mother's house this weekend so I'm going to give Jenn and Tom as much alone time as possible. If he is DJing anytime this weekend, and Jenn is going out, I am going to try to stop by while they are gone and do the rest of my laundry. Or, if Jenn is home and wants company stop by in the evening and do it and maybe cook for us.

Okay....I'm outta here for now.

HOORAY!!!

The Library opens on Sundays starting tomorrow at 1:00 pm.!

See you later...

........Dave

"We Are Not In the Housing Business" - News and Features - Baltimore City Paper

Good Afternoon;

This is from the Baltimore City Paper, Wednesday 9/26/10. It is part 3 of a 4 part series;

Just click for a direct link:

"We Are Not In the Housing Business" - News and Features - Baltimore City Paper

Later..............Dave

"Null And Void........................"

Good Afternoon;

Below is a link to an article in this past Sunday's 'Baltimore Sunpaper' about the loss of funds for a housing program.

(just click on the word 'null' below for a direct link)

null

Later....Dave

"Rained Out And Reined In.....................'

Good Afternoon;

When I left here yesterday to stop by Mike's for a minute on the way to Jenn's the rain had almost stopped and I thought it was the end of it. Silly me! I had given my umbrella, (one of the three I collected this week just laying around on benches, bus stops, the train or the ground in public areas where the likely hood of anyone returning to look for them was extremely low), to a woman I met in the Giant who I knew from the Pikesville Starbucks that has closed up. She, Charlotte, and her daughter Ixia, were walking home with their groceries and had farther to walk than I..(or so I thought!)..and I have 2 more left in the shed anyway. I took the bus to Mike's street and he had told me 'last house on the right', for some reason, (maybe the fact that I have not been down that particular street in 30 years?), I had the impression that this street was only a block or so long. Half a mile later I came to his house and as I came up on the porch the rain began to come down again in torrents. When I started to leave a bit later for Jenn's he offered to drive me, and being lazy but not stupid, I of course jumped at the chance.

When I got to Jenn's the rain had slackened a bit again, but by the time I made a sandwich, ate, and packed my bag of food for today the full fury of the third and final batch of precipitation had hit. I asked Jenn if she or Tom would drive me back to the shed when he got home from his meeting and she said sure. A few minutes later she called to me and said she had just talked to Tom and he was on the way home and said "it was like a full blown monsoon out there, tell Dave he's staying on the couch!"...again, being lazy but not stupid....LOL!, I took advantage of it!. Not expecting to sleep there or spend the night I had not brought my sleep wear or my dirty laundry, so when Jenn asked me to walk over to the office and out $20.00 on the laundry card and told me I could do a load on them, I had only the few things left there from the last time and what I had on to wash...story of my life..get a freebie and can't take full advantage of it..lol.

After I showered and shaved and downed about 9 cups of fresh brewed coffee I ate and packed up my 'food bag' and hit the road for the library. I got here about 2:30 pm. and after I finish this I'm heading over to Mt. Washington to see what damages, if any were suffered by the Starbucks and whole Foods there. The whole area was evacuated yesterday morning due to the rising flood waters, but the TV coverage never showed the extent, if any, of the flooding. They did show more of the installation of the I-beams that I watched the workers do on Wednesday.

When I left the shed I only expected to be gone for about 2 hours, so I did not roll up the sleeping bag and blankets and pads, and put everything away in it's place as I usually do. I worried about the wind blowing open the door, it has been really gusty out, but when I walked by there this afternoon on the way here all looked secure and 'normal'. There was a car in the parking lot so I did not linger to go inside and explore further...I guess I'll find out tonight when I get back.

Tomorrow, I am supposed to get my little bit of cash, and it looks as if it is committed already. I have to put $20.00 on my phone or lose service, I owe about $40.00 that I need to pay back, another $17.00 for the monthly bus pass, and at least $50.00 for meds. I have to put some aside for time with Rachel and I guess I'll have enough left for 1 excursion for myself somewhere, whether it's a restaurant, bar, movie, show...etc. Then there are the little everyday things that crop up, personal hygiene items, OTC meds, coffee, et. al.

This is Free Fall Baltimore month by the way, so there is a boatload of events and attractions with no admittance fee for this month only.

http://www.freefallbaltimore.com/

(link above)

I have not yet looked the site over in detail, but I know some of the stuff fills up way early, so you need to sign up now. Other things are more relaxed, especially the places that are free the whole month.

It was just mentioned to me that it is Succos every day for me, living in a ramshackle 'booth', (Succoh), open to the night sky as it is......LOL!

There is an article in the Baltimore City Paper, (part 3 of 4), on addiction, treatment, and housing in Baltimore that my be of interest to some of the loyal readers here. The link is in the post titled

"We Are Not In The Housing Business"

either just previous to or just after this one.

Ditto for an article in the Baltimore Sunpaper about the loss of funding for housing for the homeless and the disabled, in the post tiltled:

"Null And Void"

I'm done here today and it's close to closing time..

Later.........Dave

"God Willin' and The Creek Don't Rise.............................."

Good Evening;

So I just left the shed a few minutes ago for the first time to day except for a brief run to the Giant to use the bathroom and shave. Every time I wanted to leave it was or began to rain so hard that there was no way I was going out into for no real reason. I just lay back down and read or watched the DVDs I have out from the library, and watched the water pour in through the holes in the roof in the lower part of the shed. I was up all night until after 5:00 am. anyway adjusting and readjusting the water runoff systems I have in place where it drips over or near me, so I was not in the mood to go anywhere anyway. This is the longest I have ever stayed in there at a stretch, from 10:00 pm. last night until 5:45 pm.this evening. The only reason I am out is to stop by and pick up some meds and then stop at Jenn's and grab some of the food in the fridge, since I am out of everything, cash and stamps, and will be out of a bus pass tomorrow, until I get my little bit of cash on Saturday. As you can probably guess, I'm not in the best of moods today, and it's a toss up whether I was better off staying in or trying to go out and see people. I don't know if it happened or not, but the landlord and facilities maintenance people at Mt. Washington Mill where the Starbucks is at were preparing for flood waters by blocking off all unused or rarely used doorways with aluminum I beams and silicone sealant, and if flooding is imminent the whole area is evacuated, so I probably would have been out of a place to do anyway.

Anyway,

Later.............

............Dave

"Back To School....Back To Sleep....Back To Basics..........(burp.........'scuse me!)............"

Good Afternoon;

So I left here yesterday and went over to Prologue and my caseworker was in a meeting that had been rescheduled at the last minute so we had a quick talk in the lobby. Shelly gave me a bag of school supplies for Rachel and we made a note of the new court date (which I just found out about, the night before!!, and god only knows how long it sat and would have sat at the place where I get my mail if I had not called and asked!, but that's another rant....lol.), and tentative arrangements for a transportation and documentation. I then took a shower and remembered why I don't like to use the shower there. It had no exhaust fan and is situated in the geographic center of the building on the ground floor, so you cannot get dry for all the moisture in the air, I have to go out in to the public hallway to dry my feet and put on socks and shoes. Also it is a disability access shower, with no rim, only a 'bump' at floor level, and is poorly constructed so all the water splashes and spills out in to the rest of the room. Annoying enough that I avoid it except for urgent needs...or memory lapses.

I called the 'ex' and asked if Rachel was home and she said yes and come on by, so I did. I spent about 3 hours over there with Rachel and her mom, and 3 of her other siblings, (from the 'ex'es' first marriage), the cats and the dog. It was a pleasant few hours and we both needed the time together. And I needed the fresh brewed coffee!!

After I left there I went over the Starbucks and sat and read. (I forgot to mention that I was given a bag of 'marked out' sandwiches on Monday night, 3/4 of which I sent home with Jenn to put in her fridge for me when she gave me a ride back to Pikesville Monday night.......another example of either "one door opens when one door closes", and that horseshoe that is stuck up my....LOL!!...since that afternoon I had spent my last bit of funds on food for the day.) I took the early bus back and was laying down and asleep by 11:15 pm. I woke up at 1:00 am. thinking it was dawn again, then fell back asleep until 9:00 am., the longest period of uninterrupted sleep I've had in weeks. I ended up getting out of the shed about 11:30 am, having dozed in and out again.

I'm heading over to Jenn's to get a cup or three of coffee and something to eat, (and she answered my e-mail with an affirmative and the word.....'meatloaf!'....meaning either she has made her famous "Bacon Wrapped Meatloaf"....MMMmmmmm!!!!,.............Comfort Food Extrordinaire!!!!...........or.....get over there like "A Bat Out Of Hell!"......LOL!

Later ......Dave.

P.S....To 'Drackar'.....until recently the volume of hits per day were not worth the trouble, the projected returns being only a few dollars a month...Thanks though for the thought.

"Indigestion, Immodium, Insomnia............"

Good Morning;

I just stopped by the library on the way to my meeting at Prologue to check my e-mail and had a few minutes to spare so here I am.

Last night was Another strange sleep pattern taking it's turn at driving me insane, (and we all damn well know that it only takes a short putt!!).

I made sure I used the bathroom at the gas station about 11:15 pm. before I went to lay down and ended up falling asleep about Midnight. I woke up around 2:10 am. with the worst acid stomach and heartburn and took a handful of Giant brand Tums and fell back asleep pretty quickly, at 4:40 am. I was awakened by the sudden and urgent need to get to the bathroom and rushed over to the gas station and Daniel unlocked the door for me and I barely made it. 30 minutes later when I was sure the Immodium had taken effect and I would not again have to scramble over in a mad dash against the clock and Mother Nature, hoping the restroom is empty, I went back and lay down....and "BING"...wide awake. I tried to read and fall asleep but I finished my book first and finally fell asleep at 7:30 am.....and was awakened by the alarm at 8:30 am....GGRREEAATT!!!!

Well I'm on my way now.....back later today.......

...Dave

"Sleepless In The Shed.........With Seattle's Weather Though......................."

Good Afternoon;

So tracking backwards...woke up to rain, went to sleep to rain, woke up to rain, and it looks like a trend for the next day or so also. Having been so dry and so hot the wood and assorted fibers making up the roof of the shed have contracted, thereby creating new temporary leak spots until the materials swell up and close off the access points. A couple of these are old friends and I can pinpoint and anticipate their locations, and deal with them in whatever manner is suitable. The others seem to wait until I fall asleep and intermittently and irregularly drip on any exposed skin, OR the water droplets hit the shelving somewhere above me causing them to splatter into many smaller droplets which spray on me at random, sort of like a 'daisy cutter' bomb, or a 'jumping jack' landmine anti-personnel devices....or a MIRV!........LOL!

Anyway, to recap the weekend. I spent Friday night on Monkee's couch and could not get to sleep, (even after I turned off the laptop and the cable TV), as it was so hot and stuffy in the house. I had the fan blowing on me but all it really did was dry out my eyes and my sinuses.

I fell asleep after dozing in and out for hours about 7:00 am. and got up at 10:00 am. She came downstairs shortly afterwards and we talked for a bit and I e-mailed Jenn askimng if I could come over and shower, and if she was doing any laundry. She said to come over after 11:30 am. and by the time Monkee and I said our goodbyes and did the ..."Oh yeah and one more thing....." bit.....a half dozen times....lol!, it was 12:30 pm. by the time I left. I got to Jenn's about 1:30 pm. and she asked me if I minded watching the kids for a bit while she ran to Target, met her friend Shannon for lunch and then went to the Giant. She told me I could do a whole load of my laundry on her card, (the complex'es washers and dryers use a reloadable debit card instead of coins), and eat lunch as a bribe...lol. She eventually got home around 8:00 pm., just a wee bit later than I expected..LOL!! I had played with, read to, fed, washed, and put the kids in pajamas and to bed by then, and had showered and did my laundry too. We talked for a while and I caught the 11:30 pm. bus back to the shed, and got the bedding set up and lay down to read, and again dead tired and near exhaustion could not get to sleep. I must have fell asleep about 4:00 am., because the downpour and thunder woke me up at 4:30 am. I dozed in and out for few hours and woke up and took my meds at 7:30 am. and the rain was still coming down in buckets. I fell asleep until 9:00 am....still pouring. I read and dozed and just lay there until 2:30 pm. when the rain finally took a break. The combination of weather and depression and the exacerbation of my back pain from the rain and Monkee's couch and being stuck in the shed with no reason to get up and no place to go, and the fact that even if I did I would have gotten soaked juts getting to the bus stop all sort of fueled the 'Who cares, why bothers, WTFs' that seemed to enshroud me. I finally forced myself to get up and out and I stopped at the Giant to washup and use the bathroom and get something to eat and make a cup of instant coffee, (the hot water in from the sink faucet is back up to HOT!, not quite where it was,but..it'll do), and caught the bus to the train to the train to Mt. Washington and walked over to the Starbucks. From the time I got out of the shed until almost 7:00 pm. I probably did not exchange more than 2 dozen words with anyone, and what we did say were the normal formalities involved in an order/purchase/transaction at the register.

Drew, a college student and employee at Whole Foods next door came up to me in the coffee shop and mentioned that he saw the Fox 45 story and we got to talking about Fells Point where we have both worked, and memories of some of the places down there and how much it has changed and lost it's avant garde/bohemian flavor and surrendered to 'gentrification' and 'yuppie-ism'. After that, silence again reigned supreme. Which did nothing for my sense of isolation and loneliness.

I caught the early bus back to the Plaza Station this time instead of sitting out back on the patio and caught the 9:50 pm. bus back up to Pikesville, and stopped in the gas station to use the bathroom. Daniel said he saw the story when Fox45 aired it again on the Friday morning early newscast, and we laughed about that. I was in the shed again by 10:15 pm., after stopping by the 'Dunkin Dumpster' for a couple bagels and donuts.

AGAIN!! I could not get to sleep, (and I drank De-Caf!! at the coffee shop!), and ended up finishing my last book from the library, re-watching Danny Kaye in "The Court Jester"...(The vessel with the pestle and the flagon with the dragon and the chalice from the palace!!!.....one of the funniest bits in one of the funniest movies he ever made....and OMG!!! the "Murder She Wrote" old lady, Angela Lansbury, was incredibly hot when she was younger!!!......LOL!!, sorry I forgot the PC police don't like that.....LOL!!!!!!!), and then the DVD from the Jimmy Buffett "Live In Hawaai" set, and then listening to both CDs form the set....and then I was left alone with the voices in my head. Not really what I needed! I don't know when I at last passed out, but at 5:45 I had an urgent summons to get up and I put on my ratty old sneakers and grab the umbrella and swim over to the gas station and use the restroom....just in time. I moved some drip catching/diverting paraphenalia around when I got back to the shed, and changed my socks and tee shirt and lay down and read a while from a John D. MacDonald 'Travis McGee' novel ,('The Dreadful Lemon Sky'), that I have not read for a while and that I had forgotten was in the shed. Read until 7:00 am. when I took my meds and tried to go back to sleep. Dozed in and out and on and off again, not restful, no REM sleep in days, and the only dreams I have are either shattered, beyond attainment anymore, or nightmares, flashbacks or hallucinations.

Oh well......., I got up and went to the Giant, washed up and shaved, and spent the last $3.45 on the Foodstamps card....no I aplogize, there so $0.01 left on it, on a sale package of discounted deli and bag of chips. This is my last 'store bought' meal until the 2nd of October. Actually it is a 'Combo Meal' because I am using the bagels from the 'Dunkin Dumpster' for the bread of my sandwich.....lol!

I'm out of here as soon as I get some more reading material and maybe some music and DVDs. I'm heading over to the coffee shop most likely after that. I have to get out of here before I go off...there are 3 loud, annoying, mannerless, gay, black, 'Manwichers' in here crowding over everyone else's shouldrs and swinging their arms and doing the '2 snaps up' thing all over the place while watching their 'buddies' on Facebook and YouTube. The rudeness and cursing, (and hypocrissy as they also are watching some 'hellfire and damnation' charismatic preacher and "gettin' mah praise on...snap, snap, snap", while having hissy fits and "no she dih-int"-ing over somebody's comment/outfit/pose). It's a library!!!, there are little kids right next to you!!!

Mow I gotta go..the 'ex' is here for the card she never picked up weeks ago...that now has no money on it!!!

Later...........Dave

"What's In A Name?........................ Everything!.........."

Good Morning Again;

One thing I neglected to mention in my last post that may describe not only my love but my respect:

My darling Rachel's middle name is Michelle!

sweet dreams..................Dave

"Talk Soup"..............&....................... 'Major Love, In A Minor Key'.............."

Good Morning;

It's a few minutes after midnight and Monkee and I have been running our mouth's for the past 3 hours catching up on all the things we have had no real time to talk about in the past few months. The Metro subway is closed so she said I should just crash out on the couch since her 'friend' hasn't called and his 'window of opportunity' has just been closed, locked, the shade pulled down, and the storm shutters bolted........LOL!!!

We are sitting here listening to the neighbor's rug rats, porch monkeys, and yard apes, and even a curtain climber outside running up and down, and in and out!!, of the street. They are even coming up on the porch and shouting in the window to/at her.

Curfew??......curfew?.........."we don't care nuthin' 'bout no stinkin' curfew!".

Where are the parents you ask?......Inside watching TV, (and I'm giving them the benefit of the doubt, because this IS the 'hood', right down the street from one of B-more's many 'crack corners', and the odds on one of the other alternatives is a lot higher than you or me hitting the Powerball jackpot!), sleeping,....happy the noisy little brats aren't in the house bothering them.

And C.P.S. wanted to remove Rachel from her mother's house because of a temporary utility cutoff???? What's wrong with this picture?

Well I made it to the Starbucks before Michelle and we spent almost 4 hours exchanging the latest news, reminiscing, laughing, philosophizing, gossiping, identifying and delineating the city's/country's/world's ills and comparing our ideas on how to solve them....and trying to wrap our minds around the concept that it has been just short of 11 years ago that we first met, (and at the same time expressing amazement that we have not known each other always), and how we knew from the moment we met that a very special, rare and unique connection existed between us, which was almost physical in it's occurence. Call it 'love at first sight', but a spiritual, not romantic thing, "agape" as it is known as. And it was not through lack of desire on my part, but a combination of circumstance, timing, and moral & ethical constraints which prevented a typical or predictable relationship from developing. The next thing we realized we had shared more intimate feelings, deep personal revelations, and soul baring confessions of hopes, dreams, fears, and desires than most people who had been married for years, that we were soulmates and friends for life, and that if the time ever came for us to be lovers in the physical sense, we'd know it instantly and intuitively....but it wasn't then. (or Now..). Which in it's own way was a very liberating thing, to have someone you can trust 100%, who you can tell ANYTHING...and not be judged, without the complicated and sometimes convoluted dances of ettiquette that being lovers sometimes requires.

Anyway, 'you had to be there',......lol.

And Michelle................Thanks.

So.....by the Grace of God, the kindness and generosity of a dear friend, and the courtesy of Monkee I now have the meds to last me until the 2nd of October when I'll (hopefully...knock wood) get my little bit of monthly cash. I should be able to stretch the couple $$ left on my Foodstamps card, supplemented with a trip or two to Jenn's and offering to cook, and any 'mark outs' from the sandwich case, and of course the handy dandy donut and bagel recyle stop...the "Dunkin Dumpster" if neccessary. The phone has 1 minute left on it and I'm not answering any calls, so it's my watch and beeper until the 1st of the month, (and I have to put some cash opn my other number next month or lose service), and I have one Quarter and a handful of Pennies in a baggie that is the day's 'floor finds'.

Well the little brats just went inside and I'm going to rack out on the couch too.

I just want to close by remarking on what a lovely thing it is to be trusted, with someone's house or apartment, their laptops, with the knowledge that you are believed in, with their children, with their secrets.

Next time you see a homeless person, look beyond the label and see the human being.....with a lot of the same experiences, strengths, hopes and dreams, and fears that you do.....you never know, you may see someone you know...or would like to know.

Later................Dave

"WBFF FOX45 - Cover Story.....Like Ivory Soap---99 & 44/100 % .......Accurate!"

Good Morning;

So I went over to Jenn's apartment yesterday evening about 8:00 pm. to shower and watch the TV piece on Fox45, and to get myself in the proper mindset I watched the new CBS show "$&*% My Dad Says".....LOL! Hey I can relate on the recieving end and now that I'm an old fart....on the delivery side too....LOL!!!

Here is the link to the site and the story:

(You may have to keep clicking on the 'thumbmail' photo, or the larger main box on the left a few times to bring the video up....or it could just be the libraries computers)

WBFF FOX45 - Cover Story

It has a few discrepancies, but no major bloopers.

First; I have 25 'Followers' who have signed on to the blog, as can be seen by the list on the left, and about 100 visitors who read on a regular or semi-regular basis....NOT 'thousands'....(boy do I wish...then I could monetize and have ads and make a few pennies from Google!....LOL.)

Second; I have had about 7,900 visitors/'hits' at this point.

Third; The 'mice' do not "run by"...LOL, I am having a contest of will with 1 mouse right now, and in the nearly 2 years I have been there, it is the only rodent I have encountered.

Fourth; If you have been reading some of the older posts in the archives, you will understand that my life, though no damn picnic is not as bleak as may be inferred from watching the video.

To borrow a quote from the Christian Bible, (Mark 8:36),

"For what shall it profit a man if he gain the whole world and lose his soul"

Yeah, I may be Jewish, but then so was Jesus, and good philosophies have no boundaries!

Gotta run now, I'm meeting Michelle at Starbucks at 1:00pm. and I'm late.

Later.....probably saturday...

.......Dave

Baltimore County plots long range plan to end homelessness - baltimoresun.com

Good Morning;

Here is a link to the Baltimore Sunpaper with an article that may be of interest to you....(obviously it is to me.....LOL!), sent to me by me my long lost but recently found friend Craig:

Baltimore County plots long range plan to end homelessness - baltimoresun.com

Later........Dave

"Weasels Ripped My Flesh.......(With Appreciation And Apologies To Frank Zappa)"...........Or........"Attack Of The Amphibian Menace From Venus" .

Good Afternoon;

Another spaced out night of sleep patterns, I fell asleep reading around 11:20 pm. and woke up at 12:30 am. thinking it was near dawn. I went back to sleep and woke up at 2:30 am and could not get comfortable nor back to sleep until sometime after 6:00 am. I then went in and out until closer to 11:00 am. when I got up and went to the Giant washed up and shopped for food for the day and shaved. I was in the store for over an hour putzing around, talking and kibbitzing with people I ran into. Everyone kept asking about the TV spot and when it would be on. I am getting anxious, excited, and apprehensive, not having seen a preview myself, and not knowing if I will come off looking foolish or not. Ridicule being one of the fears and triggers that set off my self destructive trends and nose dives into the depths of truly deep depressive episodes, I am a bundle of nerves behind a facade of nonchalance in public, inside it feels like a 'boogle', (really, it's one of the terms for a group, or 'gang'....see wikipedia!!!..LOL!), of weasels trying to gnaw their way out throgh my stomach and my skull.

Speaking of wildlife, being on the streets and moving around a lot on foot, I see a lot of different animals, especially at night, that would surprise most people in an urban setting. Within the City Limits of Baltimore I have seen deer, foxes, a coyote, egrets, herons, skunks, hawks, falcons, vultures, and beavers and otters. Not mention the rabbits, squirrels, rats, and birds everyone sees. Crossing the bridge on Smith Ave. over the Jones Falls from Falls Rd. into Mt. Washington Mill I have looked over the parapet and seen Red Eared Slider turtles and raccoons, 8 or ten types of fish from tiny hatchlings to a monster catfish onone day after a flood.

Last night I had a bizarre experience on the back patio pof the Starbucks in Mt. Washington. I had gone outside and dried off one of the benches after the brief thunderstorm around 8:30 pm. and was sitting lookin at the full moon ducking in and out of the breaking cloud cover when I glanced down and saw a toad sitting on the coping around the patio and staring at me, or throughme or past me at the moon. I thought nothing of it as I see a toad or two occasionally out there. When I looked again there were 6 toads sitting there, not moving a muscle and just staring. Well I thought that this was a bit strange but maybe after the hot day, the rain had brought them out. I sat for an half hour or so just looking at the patterns of reflected light on the clouds and the full moon and the planet shining brightly near it in the sky, (Venus or Jupiter..???). I looked around and nearly jumped out of the chair, there were at least 2 dozen toads of all sizes ranged around the edge of the patio in a half circle staring! I stomped my foot a few times and even tossed a balled up piece of paper towards them....and they did not move!!! Talk about eerie!!! I got up and carefully stepped over and around them and walked...very cautiously!!!...down the hill through the grass to the side walk, and there were more toads hopping towards the patio! As I walked away I swear they all turned their heads in unison watching me as I left!

WWOoooOOOooOO!!!!! Freaky, huh?

Surprisingly enough I did not dream about this last night, though I did have one hallucinatory nightmare about alien amphibians invading Earth....lol! And no these were not the bigass Cane Toads from Florida that excrete an LSD like ooze from their skin that some people lick, (and those in the know, collect and boil down to crystalline powder that they mix into a drink....or so I've heard, of course I would never have tried that, nor the cow pie 'magic mushrooms' picked fresh from the pasture while still wet with the morning dew.....LOL!!!), to get high.

Well I'm out of here for now, I'm going to head over to the coffee shop and fix my sandwiches and kill some time before heading over to Jenn's to watch the new William Shatner show-"*&%$ My Dad Says" the new show adapted from a Twitter account that went viral, shower, and then watch the 10:00 pm. News on Fox 45, (channel 15 on her Comcast, yours may be different), and see if I have to disappear or not depending on whether how I am portrayed in the Cover Story.

Later.......Dave

Anyway, Thanks to everyone who has been reading and following my little "exercise in exorcism", (yeah I know, it may be growning old , but I like the phrase...LOL!), there are 7800 hits now, not bad for something I started without a clue about blogging and on a whim after hearing a show on blogs and blogging on NPR..(WYPR...Baltimore)..almost 2 years ago, that basically spread by word of mouth.

"Is It Safe?????...................."

Good Afternoon;

Okay who turned up the thermostat on the Sun?!?

It's getting hot again, I am so done with temps. over 80 degrees!

The shed was stuffy when I was finally able to force myself to get moving about 11:00 am. today. Both on the physical and mental/emotional level it was a strain. I am recovering a lot slower than usual from all the walking Rachel and I did on Labor Day and the strain/sprain/pull/wrench or whatever it was that I did to my lower back sometime that day at the State Fair. What used to heal in 4 days to a week is now taking 2 to 3 weeks or more. I could not sit up today, I had to roll over on my stomach and push myself up on my knees and hold onto the walls to stand, while all my joints creaked, crunched, popped and cracked in a complimentary chorus like a sound track to a low budget Hong Kong Kung Fu film extravaganza.

The fog of depression that keeps fading and thickening and thinning and building up again all about me seemed to sap all motivation and desire to move this morning, blanketing me with a crazy quilt of 'why bother', 'what's the point', and 'who care's'. Eventually the boredom and bladder overcame the enervation and ennui to the point where I got up and out and over to the Giant.

After I used the restroom and then purchased something to eat I ended up talking to Carol, one of the cashiers, for 30 minutes or so. As we were standing by the doorway, it seemed like 3/4 of library staff came in amd out of the Giant on their lunch breaks....lol. I treated myself to Sushi, (pre-packaged, but made fresh there at the seafood counter every day), because the collection of Giant gift cards I have been collecting had enough combined value between them that I could! (At the self service registers there are frequently discarded gift cards with cash values fo $1.00 or less left by people who have used them and do not feel like dealing with the tiny amounts left on them.....I always pick them up, and form the floor and the trash can also when I see one being thrown out, and call the "1-800" number on the back to get the balance, mark it on the card and save them up. Since the cards are what is known as 'bearer instruments' in financial terms, there are no P.I.N. numbers needed.) Today I had a 3 way combo with shrimp, eel, and tuna rolls, plus a "Black Forest Parfait" from the bakery's reduced rack. Yummmm! And tomorrow I get to feast on the leftovers of the roast I cooked at Jenn's and the Rockfish covered with a crab and cheese stuffing crusted with crushed Ritz and Triscuit crumb coating......Double Yummmmmm!!! Like I've said before, except for a couple days a month, I usually don't have a problem with finding food, (now the healthiness of my diet 3/4 of the time is not going to be heralded in 'Men's Fitness' or 'JAMA'....lol!, since for the most part it consists of various items slathered in mayonnaise and shoved in a bakery roll of some sort.), and eating is the last real pleasure I have left, so I try to make it as enjoyable as possible.

I was lucky, blessed, and grateful enough yesterday to find someone who gave me a 'bupe', so I am still in need and stressed about getting enough to last until the 2nd of October, but I now have 2 more days to search, and before I have to worry about the physical issues related to abruptly stopping the medicine without a gradual taper time.

I also made contact with my case worker from Prologue and scheduled an appointment for next week, and am going to pick up some school supplies for Rachel also. I have been in contact with my friend Michelle, who needs dental patients to practice on at the school she is attending, for cleanings and examinations, in order to get clinical time and credits towards her graduation. We are meeting for coffee Friday afternoon and to set up a time for me to come in and have (what's left.....lol!), of my teeth cleaned, and which through love, generosity, (knowing my cash flow and M.A. situation), and generally a severe lack of available bodies volunteering, she is going to pick up the fee, which while greatly reduced is still beyond my means at the moment. My circle of true and intimate friends may be extremely small, but we are willing to bleed for one another. (Which I may be doing if she slips with the dental pick.....LOL!)

Okay, time's up again.........

Later....(???)......

Dave

"Close Your Eyes Tight And Keep Repeating-----"There's No Place Like Home, There's No Place Like Home, There's No Place Like Home"................."

Good Afternoon;

I just got the word.....

Thursday night on the 10:00 pm. newscast on Fox 45 Baltimore,

there will be a story on "The Blog & I".

Also to be seen on http://www.foxbaltimore.com/ after then under 'Cover Stories'.

Well I got to Jenn's about 5:30 pm. yesterday with a splitting headache and an aching back, so of course Edward was in full hellion mode. I got him in bed by 7:45 pm. though and was able to finally sit down after cooking a small bottom round roast for dinner. I took an OTC decongestant and some ibuprofen and ended up staring at the TV for an hour without knowing what I was watching. I ended up coming out of the doze in time to watch the season premiere of "Two And A Half Men", which I think is one of the funniest shows on TV. I also ended up watching the new version of "Hawaii 5-o"....Eeehhhhhh..... I'll stick to classic reruns of the original, like the movie version of "Miami Vice", some things don't transfer well out of their era.

I started out trying to sleep on the couch but woke up in agony, I sat up and turned the TV just before Midnight and saw the close of the first half of "Famous, Rich, And Homeless" on 'Green TV', (channel 113 Comcast), which I have seen a few times before and the final segment, which I had not. Talk about a group of clueless, out of touch, spoiled, rich folks!

One thing that was interesting is the British, (and Scottish), approach to 'Homeless Hostels', as opposed to mass shelters with a 10 to 100, (or any number in between), men in cots, on pads, or the floor, these are buildings with single occupancy rooms, with doors that can be shut and locked, small but private. Some with bathroom and shower, some with just a sink. Bed, lamp, dresser, shelves, electrical outlets and electric kettles or hot plates, clean but worn maybe...but better than the stockyard/prison feeling at 'Code Blue'!

I ended up switching to the lazy-boy recliner around 2:00 am. and eventually fell asleep I was woken up about 7:30 am. by Jenn getting Edward up and fed and ready to go to school...and her and Tom bitching at one another. All in all I thought it expeditious if I just pretend to be asleep until Tom left with Ed, when I got up and went to the bathroom and then got the coffee made. I watched the news and fixed Devin her milk and gave her breakfast and we played until Jenn, (who is not feeling well right now), got up. I showered, ate, caught the 1:00 pm......and here I am. The sinuses have begun draining and the pressure in my head has lessened. The cloud surrounding me seems to be a bit thinner. The big external stressors are still no cash expected until the 2nd of October, and having used my last 2 mgs. of buprenorphine, with no new source in sight.

I have to try to track down Mike, from the Giant, who was at the doctor's office when I called, and then I'll probably head over to the coffee shop and kill the evening until it time to lay down in the shed. This may be the last cool night to sleep for a bit, the temperature is supposed to be 88-90 degrees W-T-F, and like the letters state...WTF??? Autumn begins tomorrow!!

I guess that's it for now.............Later

............Dave

"Somebody Get The Bees Out Of The Room So The Damn Buzzing Will Cease!!!!!

Good Morning;

What lovely weather outside, and what a contrast to the clouds, fog and haze I feel surrounded and enveloped by, inside and outside my head. The only positive thing is knowing it is there, awareness that it is the clinical depression, and hopefully...having the strength to outlast it again, this time...before surrendering to the inevitable.

I noted in Friday's about the onset of this bout of depression, and Saturday's nice weather seemed to counteract it a bit, but when I got to Jenn's to watch the grandkid's things seemed to be slowly but steadily increasing to the boiling, bursting, breaking point. Add in Edward's snotty attitude and on and over the edge behavior, (a lot of which was from the allergy symptoms PLUS the cold or flu which he repeatedly shared with me by spritzing me with the backspray of his [partially] covered sneezes, and the 'sneak attack' coughing fits that always seemed to be delivered in the middle of a close-in conversation or by half chewed food projectiles while chewing. Yeah I know...I was there.........Yeeeccchhhh!!!!

Saturday night I slept poorly and in a really bad position and woke up early Sunday AM. on the couch with my hips and my face directly on un-padded or barely covered portions of the frame, with the aches, pains, bruises and contusions to match. Not to mention the total numbness and immobility on my left side which had me worried that I may have had a small stroke, (which happened to my father twice, once going unnoticed due to a whole slew of other medical issues......some of which I also have to worry about...ain't heredity wonderful), and last but not least, the 'crease and dent' on the left side of my face and head from the arm of the couch where the pillow had slipped, that is only now beginning to fade.

I spent the night because I was needed to watch the kids on Sunday also so I got a booster shot of whatever Ed has that kept him out of school on Friday. Sunday morning I not only woke up with the external bodily deterioration but with a sore throat that felt as if someone had tried to choke me with a mixture of barbed wire and broken glass, washed down with battery acid, which is still with me today. The fog in my head also began to develop texture and expand, pressing outwards against my skull to compliment the invisible orchestra of miniature percussionists playing "The Anvil Chorus" on the outside! So as you may have guessed, Sunday with a 5 year old 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Psycho' and a 2 year old whose giggling laugh almost..BUT NOT QUITE!!!..reaches frequencies beyond human hearing, and whose decibel level will cause hemorrhaging in the ears!

I ended up showering and leaving when Jenn got home around 6:00 pm. As I was leaving the apartment complex and heading over to the Subway station there was no one on the road or at the station or bus stops, it was really eerie, as if the population had disappeared from the face of the earth. It was over 20 minutes before I saw another person when the train pulled in, and another 15 minutes before a car came by. As I have said before Sundays are the worst day of the week for me and have been forever. With the depression hanging over me, the physical discomfort, and the rapidly developing cold/flu giving me that fuzzy stoned/stupid feeling, the sense of loneliness and isolation kicked in real bad. Leaving Jenn's with nowhere to go and nowhere to be, aloof and alone....

the emptiness kicked in hard. I had no cash to go anywhere else so i just rode the bus to the coffee shop and sat until they closed an hour later and then sat out back and read and wrote for the next 2 hours in the semi-light/semi-dark of the nearly full moon slipping in and out of the clouds and the pink/orange reflection of the sodium vapor lights of the city off the cloud cover. I got back to the shed about 11:00 pm. and read for a bit until the book began hitting me in the face as I kept falling asleep. At which point the med's side effects and the insomnia and the pain in my swollen joints and the osteo-arthritis moved in to keep me awake the whole damn night!!!

I fell asleep around 7:30 am., finally...and slept and dozed an hour at a time until the latino lawn and grounds crew working the shopping center today parked their trucks in the lot next to the shed and took their morning 'burrito break and mariachi music festival'....LOL! I was forced up andout around 11:30 am. and went to the Giant to wash my face and try to find someone to trade me food credit for some OTC cold/flu meds, (which I did, so now I have 'medicine head' from the antihistamines, and everything I hear is filtered through a low buzzing in the background).

I am supposed to watch the kids again tonight for Jenn, but I don't know if I am staying the night or not. Part of me wants to for the convenience, coffee maker, and cooking facilities....but, part of me does not because of the sleeping options and the 'smelly dog'.

I guess you'll find out tomorrow........LOL!

I also have to relate a very...mystical??, existential??, spiritual?? experience I had on Friday night after sundown, which was the start of Yom Kippur.

Times up...

Later.................Dave