" DO OVER....I Call For A DO OVER Today!........................."

Good Evening;

So it's 8:35 pm. and I just got online....yeah it was one of those kind of days.

Slept poorly and felt lousy, I'm running that low grade fever again. My left leg, just above the ankle is infected where I must have scratched at the funk growing there...(eczema/fungus/psoriasis?...take your pick)...in my sleep until it bled. Now I'm worrried that I have picked up the MRSI from Jenn and family. It is also a probable reaction from the 2 flu shots.

So I think I was supposed to meet Liz this morning, she was going to pick me up on the way to Prologue...but I just was not feeling right this morning so I texted her to say I was not going to make it, and that I would e-mail her later in the day......well you see what time I got on the computer...I'l have to call tomorrow. I called Jenn and asked to come by and wash clothes, and she said sure, they were going to the playground. I went over and cooked my self a chop after they left and showered and then went to go into the laundry room in the complex...the door is locked. I text Jenn with my last minute on the phone to ask.."where?"...and get back "SH*T...in my purse!" Well when she gets home 3 hours later I throw the load in, and since I am stuck there anyway...end up watching the kids until Tom is supposed to be home, about 5:30 pm. while Jenn ran out to the gym...no big deal. When I put the clothes in the dryer, some nice piece of crap who lives in the complex opened the dryer and did not shut it all the way, so the minutes ticked away and the dclothes stayed wet. I put my last dollar in the dryer and get them dry...and see a text that Tom is gonna be an hour or so later that he thought due to traffic and the line here at the library... and so it goes to day..now the library is closing and I'm not done what I have to do.....

later....Dave

"A Spike In Each Arm.....Keeps The Doctor Away......................."

Good Afternoon;

I left here yesterday and went across town to Monkee's and sat on her porch for 2 hours waiting for her to get back from the hairdressers. I ate the salad I made at the Giant earlier that morning...(Spring mix greens, romaine and iceberg lettuces, diced tomatoes, grilled and oven roasted chicken strips, sliced and slivered radishes, ham salad, croutons, cantaloupe, honey toasted pecans, huge juicy blackberries, creamy caesar dressing, shredded Parmesan cheese, surimi-[fake crab chunks], and balls of fresh mozzarella.......the fruit and the nuts really worked, especially the blackberries........and of course today, there were none on the salad bar...story of my life)...and listened to the Playaway audio book I currently have checked out...(A collection of Louis LaLamour short stories read by Willie Nelson, with some of them dramatized and acted out with Johnny Cash, Kris Kristofferson, Willie, and others)...'til she got home. After I got a couple days worth of 'bupes' on credit...( I really have to find exactly what's what with this M.A. in regards to getting a legitimate source). I ran into my old buddy Barry, who lives across the alley from Monkee and we talked for a while, and there must of been 10 people who I had not seen in ages walk past us. I then went by bus and train to Mt. Washington to the coffee shop, where I stayed until closing...it was a real slow night..(as was Friday)..at times I was the only customer there.

I mentioned as I was signing off yesterday that I could feel the cloud of depression descending upon me. Things got foggier and foggier as the night wore on. The one time I wanted someone to stop by and talk, something more than a superficial chat, no one shows up. Any other time, if I want to watch a movie or read...I can't escape the attention......last night...nada.

After I got back to the shed, via the Giant and a medicinal box of donuts from the day old reduced rack and a pint of milk, I watched some more of "Jeeves and Wooster" until the battery died, then lay there, unable to sleep for the next 4 &1/2 hours, mind racing and thoughts all twisted and confused as the black fog of depression enveloped me in a shroud of despair. I had asked Jenn earlier that night if I could come over and shower and do a load of laundry. She said they had no money on the card for the washers and dryers, I told her I was broke and would just come over and shower. I had woken up about a quarter to seven to the bladder's urgent alarm, and fell back asleep, waking at the same time the phone rang, eating up my last minute, at 10:00 am. It was Jenn asking if I was coming over. I told her that it made no sense if I could not wash clothes and I'd see her later. I finally made it out of the sleeping bag about 11:30 am. and went over to the Giant to use the facilities and get some thing for breakfast..(and the coffee machine is still broken)..but it was insanely busy. So much so that they had stock people working the registers. I could not make up my mind whether to sit and wait for the library to open or get on the bus and head over to the Starbucks, (I have enough on the assorted cards for a cup of coffee, I sat on the payphone for 20 minutes after calling the toll free number and keying in all the numbers on the cards and writing the totals down and adding them up), dithering back and forth.

There was a Baltimore County Health department van in front of the library offering both H1N1 and Seasonal flu shots for free, so I decided what the hell, why not! I had a woman on each arm, jabbing me with a syringe.....(brings back memories of the old days.....lol). The Nurse Practitioner who interviewed me suggested that some of my chronic medical issues may be related to Fibromyalgia. There are times, like........Now!, when EVERYTHING hurts, and I am always tired and yet cannot sleep until I literally pass out. This is the third time this has been brought up in a casual medical atmosphere, as soon as I get this M.A. confusion straightened out, and a permanent primary physician to work with, I have to get some accurate diagnoses about this. I think that Liz and I also have to amend some of the S.S.A. forms to reflect this.

I then came in here and signed in for the computer, and waited 40 minutes. This is the second session for me and I think it's gonna be the last, the list is now too long. I'm going to get some coffee at the Starbucks and sit in the sun for a while, with any luck I'll fall asleep for a while. I just hope I don't fall asleep on the train or the bus and end up in south or east Baltimore...lol. One of the worst things about being without a residence is having no place to just sit and spend time doing nothing. Everyday I have to get up out of the sleeping bag and go somewhere else. If you have nowhere to go, all you do is get out of bed and go into another room, or even just sit in a chair or lay in bed in your bedroom, I don't have that available. And when there is absolutely NO money in my pocket and the depression is weighing me down and I have no place to go.....here come those "ideations" as the head doctors call them. The vicious circles keep getting smaller and tighter until they are like a 'black hole', an intense psycho-gravitational anomaly that sucks in not only all matter, light, and energy, but eventually even the last bit of hope, finally crushing soul and psyche. Sometimes the only answer seems to be to cut and run, taking the ultimtate adventure ride to the true 'last frontier', while the choice is still mine...........Yeah,welllll, enough of that.

I guess I'll be back here tomorrow....or do I have a meeting with Liz tomorrow morning to fill out the rest of the paperwork for S.S.A.? The short term memory loss is getting worse. I am starting to forget all kinds of things now. The short term memory loss is getting worse. I am starting to forget all kinds of things now.

I guess I'll be back tomorrow.

.............later...........................................Dave

"Once More....Over The Top............!"

Good Morning;

So the choice this morning is between spending my last dollar on a cup of coffee OR kicking both caution and common sense to the curb and placing an offering on the altar of Dame Fortune and buying a Keno ticket. The coffee machine at the Giant is not only no longer set to dispense free coffee, it is also out of order, (and there are no cups). I'll tell you how it turns out later today or tomorrow afternoon. One way or another I need some coffee. I can probably shuffle through my deck of assorted Starbucks gift cards, some of which have positive balances of $0.09 to $0.50, to scrounge up $1.50...I'll just have to make sure that there is no one behind me in line at the time as one of the barristas swipes and reads each card, one by one by one......lol.

I rode the buses over to the coffee shop yesterday evening afterr I signed off here, as you remember I was worried about getting caught in a down pour. As I walked out the doors the rain stopped suddenly and the sun came out. By the time I got to Starbucks the sky had clouded up again and of course when I finally got my coffee and the newspaper and got settled in, and the bench and table rearranged, and the DVD player opened and turned on, and everything set up and comfortable....it began to rain again. Big fat drops of water that hit and exploded in to myriads of pieces of liquid shrapnel, soaking everything in sight. I grabbed the things most likely to be damaged by water and ran in side and dumped them on the nearest table and dashed back out and grabbed the rest of my things, banging my knee and losing my balance and falling against the door frame and hitting and twisting my neck...(that had just healed!!)...in the process.

Of course the rain immediately stopped.

The Starbucks is having major A/C issues, (it was so hot at one point yesterday that one of the barristas nearly passed out at the register, as she turned a bit too quickly to serve a customer......in front of the area manager who treats all the employees as if they are merely furniture or equipment, just another part of the inventory on a computer printout.....Ah, yes...big business in America...wage slaves and corporate whores...but I digress...), and it gets pretty warm inside, even when it is not extremely hot outside, so I wiped off the bench and the table and started to move back out to the patio....when the rain began again. I guess you can see where this is going, huh? Yeah, everytime I even thought about going back out, it started to rain....then stopped after a few minutes.

I left the Starbucks at closing and took the scenic route back to Pikesville, making the connections that combined the least amount of walking between stops and having bus shelters with good enough lighting to read by. I stopped by the library and sat under the portico to finish reading the last dozen or so pages of my book, (in the rain again, and as I finished the wind began to pick up), "Ghosts Of Manhattan", by George Mann, (SF/Mystery/Crime novel--'Steam Punk' genre...not bad), then hit the shed and watched some more "Jeeves and Wooster" on the DVD player until the battery died. Another night of unrestful sleep, I spent most of it listening to the wind, as it whistled, roared, and moaned, shaking and rattling the shed and all the bits and pieces hanging off of it.

I got up about 8:30 am and as I said went to the Giant looking for coffee, no luck on that but I got a salad for breakfast and now I'm about to cruise over to Monkee's and take advantage of her generosity for a few day's worth of meds until I can find a way to raise some cash.

I feel as if the 'Big Dipper of Depression', as the emotional rollercoaster I seem to be involutarily strapped into is called..(in the front seat of the first car no less...lol), is about to start it's descent into Hell's Canyon.....hang on, sometimes it's a bumpy ride!

Later.....................Dave

"Paper Trails And Government Snails...................................."

Good Afternoon;

Wow, 84 degrees today, and forecast high for tomorrow of 61 degrees!

All these hot flashes, somebody give Mother Nature something for her menopause!...LOL!..(or a dose of Ritalin for the ADHD...lol).

So Liz and I went to D.S.S., (Northwest Family Investment Center, Reisterstowm Rd. At Menlo Dr. in the old Fairlanes Bowling Alley...uh-oh...showing my age again), it was her first trip there and when I explained that it mirrored the patrons and attitude and odor and noise level of the City run shelters and some other shelters and missions, differing only in gender ratio,...she "GOT!" why I avoid them like the plague. We were only there about an hour and a quarter, 10 minutes to go through security and sign in, 20 minutes of waiting before being called into the 're-con' room, 20 minutes waiting in there before being called to a workers desk, 20 minute with the worker as he checked the forms we had filled out, (3 sets..2 we had brought from prologue, 1 the sign in worker had given us...PLUS the pages the worker had to go fetch because the packet we had been given on arrival was incomplete. ALL the same in terms of information given, but each arranged in a different manner, with different revision dates, [2 forms only 2 months apart], and one with a slew of cover/instruction pages....INCLUDING...LOL!! 1 page boasting about their participation in the ..wait for it..............'Paper Work Reduction Act'......ROTFLMAO!!!

We filled out some more of the reams of paper sent by S.S.A in regards to my S.S.I. claim, and we tried to get a straight answer about how long the extension that was suppose to have been granted actually is...anywhere from Friday, (today), to NEXT Friday, to 60 Days from the 26th of March...who the hell knows????

My biggest fear is that they will somehow misfile...HA!...my recertification and I will not get anything on May 2nd, or 7th. It won't be the first time it's happened...or the 10,000th....just read the newspaper.

I took a shower at Prologue, and shaved and changed into my goofy shorts, (what the heck..they're shorts, and it's hot out....I'll live with it)..

I don't know what to do now, I am so broke I can't even pay attention! And now the sky is as dark at 5:07 pm. as it usually is at 7:30 pm.....Uh--OHHH, was that thunder......loverly, simply effin' loverly, a storm front just as the library is about to close and the next bus is 20 minute away and there is no cover on any of these stops near here. Now the power is fluctuating and the lights are flickering......Grrreeeaattttttttt!

Well if I can....operative word IF!, I'm going to head to the Starbucks, because it is the only place I can go sit for free.

I gotta get some cash tomorrow....somehow. I need to see Monkee and get some meds.

I wanted to see Rachel at least to take a walk, but she is staying over Bubbies this weekend.

Welllll, I guess I'm gonna sit and eat, I can't even afford a beer, so I'll 'munch' my blues away....lol!

Buuurrpppp!

See you tomorrow..........Dave

"Paper Cuts Can Be Hazardous To Your Mental Health......................"

Good Morning;

I'm sitting in the computer lab at Prologue with Liz while we are trying to save some time by filling out the D.S.S. recertification form on line.

Of course the setup is designed to be as obstructionist as possible. We can only print out the forms needed and still have to go down to the location and wait...and wait..and wait......snore.........! OH Sorry, dozed off there...LOL!

Last night was a bad night for sleeping, even the bird above me was restless..and Noisy!

Okay, gotta go now and put the same information down that is already on file 8 times so far. Then wait 2 hours until some one looks at it and says okay you can go now .

Then they will lose it and I will have to do it all over again, we may as well fill out 2 copies now!

Later........Dave

"I Must Be A Mushroom --- Living In Darkness And Dampness And Being Fed Shit....................."

Good Afternoon;

Okay, the doctor wants me to chart my blood pressure over the next 2 weeks.

Rather than trying to carry around a sheet of paper, and of course not being able to find it and starting another sheet and then finding it after a few days...etc., I'm going to do it here...lucky you...lol.

Monday's avg.-----145/98

Tuesday's avg-----140/90

Wednesday's avg.-140/85

Thursday's avg. ---142/75

I started the Lisonpril/HCTZ on Thursday of last week, the BP before I began had averaged 145/110, so the diastolic, (minimum) pressure has steadily declined.I have been checking it in the Giant on the free automatic sphygmomanometer, (Gee, I love that word..lol!!), and while it may not be as precise as the measurements from the doctor's office, (though now that I think back, both doctor's technicians/nurses got wrong readings of 'normal'..120/80..and when I told the doctor she, in both cases..lol, got a measurement more in line with my averages...hmmm?), it is extremely consistent and will illuminate any trends.

So, last night after I left the Starbucks, after spending the afternoon at Jenn's being a combination nanny, chef, and laundress, I slipped into the shed just out of sight of the local gendarmes as they drove around the corner....(they have to wondering where I disappeared to.....lol). My flashlight batteries gave up the ghost even before I could get the door closed so I was working blind as my eyes had not yet adjusted to the darkness. I got the bar in place and headed back to the rear, wishing I was either a mole or a bat, with the proper sensory receptors for working in the dark. I ALMOST remembered exactly where the two separate step ups, and the overhead low hanging drainage board was...Ow..Oww..Owww! At least the knot on my head cancels out the stubbed toes...........LOL! I finally made it to my sleeping area without permanent damage...(though who would be able to tell....lol!)...and pulled out the DVD player and opened the screen and turned it on....Let There Be Light!! Of course I had no movies, but it was enough light to read by for an hour before the battery died.

I now have to be sure I charge it somewhere and decide whether it is more important to buy a pair of D batteries at the dollar store, or hold on to the 3 dollars that I have left. Decisions...decisions.....lol!

I just checked out 2 DVDs, 'Napoleon", a history/biography A&E series, and "Jeeves and Wooster" , the P.G. Wodehouse stories, also from A&E. Now I have 25 hours of video to watch and use a light fro the next 12 & 1/2 nights..(2 hour battery life...lol), which should keep me until I am able to (hopefully) cash the check or money order from the synagogue I am supposed to speak at on the 25th. Food is OK, with the Stamps I have left, now I have to figure out where to get some bucks for my meds when the 'bupe' runs out on Saturday, and coffee money 'til then too.

I am not expecting any other monies until May 2nd..(IF my recertification process is not screwed up this Friday).
I am meeting with Liz for a couple hours tomorrow morning before we go to D.S.S., to fill out MORE paperwork for the S.S.I. claim. That is how S.S.A. sets the system up, so people get so tired of all the forms and repetition and 'lost' paperwork, and revised questionaires, and building in 2 denials automatically, that folks just give up. Like I have before....but not this time, thanks to having an advocate who is familiar with the system.

I received an e-mail today from someone who tried to give me some clothing a few weeks ago. It was an Orthodox Jewish person, commonly known by themselves and others as 'Frum', and the clothing was typical of the 'unofficial uniform' of these folks; white dress shirts, black trousers, vest, and suit coat. Besides the fact that the clothes were not very clean, and that some were ripped, frayed and stained, they were of a synthetic blend, polyester and other fibers, which is hot in the summer and cold in the winter, and generally ill fitting. On top of that, the waist MAY have fit me, (I looked at the size tag, I was not abouit to try them on), the previous owner was about 6 inches shorter than I was.

I declined, (I thought gracefully and courteously), thanking this person, and suggesting that someone in Their community might be better off served by the donation, than I would. The individual stormed off in a huff and I have been getting anonymous comments and dead-drop e-mails ever since (which I have not chose to publish) of an insulting and denigrating nature, accusing me of scamming everyone and not really being homeless and being an 'elitist snob'.

Hmmm....I may well be a bit of an elitist snob in some cases, such as choosing not to look like a tasteless geek in my clothing choices, and electing to avoid certain segments of society that I have little in common with...rich, poor, homeless or not... I'll own up to that. It is my perogative to say no if I want to, to associating with people who I dislike, for any reason, and to accepting someone else's trash that they are offering as a gift to please their own ego, or salve their own conscience.

Yes I do accept most things that most folks so kindly offer, but I believe, and I think that I am being honest, that I do not abuse their generosity or take undue advantage of anyone. There have been occasions where I told people I was okay, and refused a meal, or a drink, or (rarely, I'll admit to this, but I have), cash; when I felt that the person has done too much for me, and I have felt guilty, (justified or not), at taking anything else at that time.

Just because I, or any homeless person refuses a gift here, and accepts another there, does not mean that we are ungrateful or overly picky.

It is not a crime to have either pride, self respect, or taste.

And there is also the matter of safe food storage, or just a place to store things at all. Many of us just don't have one.

We are not a quick and easy dumping ground or a doll for you to dress up to show off to everyone.."Oh look over there, I gave him those clothes...wasn't that nice of me"

Yeah, can you tell somebody pushed my buttons on something....lol.

On a different note.

I want to Welcome Follower # 22, Kelly....nice of you to sign on.

I'm heading to the BMA on Sunday!

And still a different note, I see that the JT has filed for a reorganization/bankruptcy protection.

Let's support them as much as possible, if you view it online, buy a copy once in a while, or even subscribe...you can't beat the rates....less than a $1.00.....yes!! less than a dollar.....an issue for a yearly subscription!!

Damn, it's 3:00 already, I'll see you later. If not tomorrow, (Prologue, D.S.S., and the library closes at 5:30 pm.), Saturday morning.

See you.....................Dave

"Run Silent....Run Deep...............Or...........Off To See The Gizzard...."

Good Morning;

What difference between yesterday and today, at least weather-wise, and directly affecting my mood, (or moodiness......LOL), also.

I was in the library for about 4 hours yesterday and on the computer for 45 minutes, and never got around to writing or posting an entry. I spent the time watching "Tin Man" on the portable DVD player and answering and writing e-mails and web surfing.

If you have the chance check out the DVD, it is really cool, a new (2008-09) version of L. Frank Baum's 'The Wonderful Wizard of OZ', set in world where magic and technology, (the same thing, as Arthur C. Clarke said.."Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic"), and the look is part lush, green, outdoors epic & part Fritz Lang's "Metropolis"/ Jules Verne "20,000 Leagues Under The Sea", with a taste of "Blade Runner" and the sound of "Harry Potter".

FREE!!! rental at the library!

I met Jenn and Edward at the Giant and she dropped me at Starbucks in the afternoon, then back to the shed, where I passed out from exhaustion and the built up delayed reaction to Monday at HCH. I woke up chilled (but at least the birds were to cold to chirp too!...it was either that or my threats to fricassee the little buggers guts.......lol) and went to the Giant where the coffee machine is still set up to dispense free coffee...Ssshhhhh!...like it was yesterday when all the corporate big-wigs were in the store.

I am on my way to Jenn's to babysit while she goes to the gym, and shower and do laundry. Which is good because I have not enough money to wash, much less dry a load at the laundromat. It is not one of my better months, financially, I'm down to my last $5.00 and I have 5 minutes left on my SafeLink phone & the other one is empty of minutes. I have meds for BP, back muscle strain, and 'The Fungus Humungus' on my leg, and 4 days worth of my 'bupe'. I do have about $100.00 of food credit, but I cannot find anyone to trade with for cash.

Oh well, another month of 'food for thought', as I think about how I really gotta lose weight while munching out on some goodies.....LOL!

I'm hoping that any compensation I may receive from my invitation to speak on the 25th will be in cash..(doubtful), or that they will purchase a postal M.O. if I ask nicely, so I can cash it easily. But in the meantime, it's case of stretching George and pinching Abe until they scream.....lol!

I can't complain too much though, I had a great time with Rachel, twice going to spectacular shows, and being able to buy her a couple gifts 'just because'.

I was also able to send off a few dollars to 2 of the causes I support, again, 'just because', I both needed and wanted to pass on some of my good fortune, when I had it in my pocket.

I'm late for the bus, oops, gotta go, Jenn's waiting for me..........

.......later...............Dave

"And For The Rich People............ ..........You Sing!!........."

Good Afternoon;

So I left here yesterday and went to the Starbucks and ran into my pal John Erby of Umbrella Radio, (and other ventures in the music and recording industry). We had a long conversation interspersed with a few breaks for coffee and reading and computer work, covering everything from music to the Internet to entrepreneurism to the crash of the jet carrying most of Poland's government.

http://www.umbrellaradio.com/

is his website, 78 continuous hours of local musicians and music...FREE!!

CHECK IT OUT!

Again with the damn chirping and scratching and scraping....AND this morning one of the stupid fine feathered f*cks tumbles into the shed and I spend 10 minutes chasing it's avian ass down before I can toss a piece of cloth over it and shove it back out the gaping hole where the insulation fell away! As I am stuffing a piece of cardboard in the hole, another one craps on my hand and arm!!!

Anybody got a spare cat for rent?........LOL!

So I slept like crap last night even before the birdie B & E, and when I went to Prologue to meet Liz at 8:30 am. like I though we were supposed to meet, turns out it was 10:00 am., and I had an hour to kill before she showed up. Washed up, shaved, brushed my teeth, brushed them again, and yet again..(Cold Tuna Melt for breakfast..Thanks, Ashley.....LOL!), changed my socks and put the creme on the creeping crud that is colonizing my ankles, snagged a cup of watery coffee, and then we hit the road to Franklin Square Hospital and the offices of Health Care for the Homeless..(HCH)..where I had an anxiety attack and a nasty panic attack. The room felt as if it was contracting, and my mind felt as if it was being compressed within my skull. I wanted to break away and just run, no destination...ANYWHERE.....but there....!

I'm glad Liz was there, for a couple reasons. One...to have a witness, someone to testify on my behalf, that at times I DO become totally debilitated and dysfunctional because of them; and also because she was a familiar anchor that helped me to hang on and ride it out. If I had been there alone....well there is a good chance I would be either locked up, (in an observation room or an isolation cell, it's a 50/50 tossup), or in the process of pushing the plunger on a needle in my arm right about now. Yeah, it was that bad inside my head. I kept saying I don't like the way it feels inside my mind...I don't know if anyone knew how close to edge I was or not. I finally pulled it together just before the doctor came in...(and the examining room was not only overly warm, but must have spent it's previous life as a broom closet, i could literally stretch out my arms and hold back the walls from closing in.

I was asking Liz WHY are we actually here when the doctor came in, she, (and I cannot remember or pronounce her name, but it was African), was very kind and compassionate and competent, if a bit rushed due to the workload. The only thing different from my visit to JAI is that she suggested I STOP putting the creme on my legs, because she noticed the blood and scabs on my left leg from scratching at it in my sleep, she thought it may be some form of eczema, and I wasn't able to get my thoughts in order enough to explain, so I let it drop. I'll maybe cut down and try to moisturize as she suggested, but I am pretty sure it is fungal...from past experience. Other than that we talked about my blood pressure, (which the tech must again have screwed up on, saying it was 120/78, when it was 145/98....3 times!!...earlier.The main reason we had scheduled this appointment was that we had thought I had only the P.A.C. plan, and it would give more options and available resources. Well, now that we know that I have M.A. ...AND!?!...Supposedly?!? ...I can change providers at any time because I am homeless, I SHOULD...that is SHOULD be able to find care on this side of town. I am not going to spend 3 hours each way on buses to go to HCH, especially when the building and offices it is in are part of what triggered the attacks today. Liz is looking into this, and we are due to go to D.S.S. on Friday for re-certification of benefits, so more info MAY be available there.

I had another encounter with a connection with the past there too. Liz told me the person in charge of the social services information could tell us how to switch out of JAI to another HMO or PPO, his name is Carmen, and when Liz is speaking with him about me, he says "I know that name", having read the Baltimore Mag. story, AND having been a patron and friend of Funks and Janet the owner, I don't remember him, but we must have met.

That's one of the reasons this town is called 'Smalltimore'!

Liz offered to buy me lunch when we left HCH, which is near Golden Ring Mall, the site of the only DQ..(that's Dairy Queen for you non-aficionados of fine dining....lol) that I know of in the Baltimore area..(within 5 miles), but the tuna was still swimming around so I chose a Heath bar Blizzard....it was great but I'll pay for it......ooops excuse me...be right back....later.....(LOL!).

She dropped me off here and that's been my day so far. I did manage to make a date for breakfast with my old friend Mike, which I am looking forward to, it's been about....20 years or so I guess.

I'm heading out to the Starbucks and the back patio now.....

............Later Dave

"Tweet Tweet My Ass...................."

Good Afternoon;

I could not sleep last night and when I did fall asleep the damn birds that are nesting in the roof and walls of the shed started their cacophony at around 4:00 am. I ache all over and am always tired recently, someone mentione dthat I should be checked for chronic fatigue syndrome, or fibromyalgia..great new ailments.

Time is about up, see you Monday..........Dave

The Schedule (April 14, 2010)

Good Afternoon;

Well they are on the road again;

The Schedule (April 14, 2010)

Good luck and fair winds;

'Iokepa and Inette.

"The People Have Spoken...................................."

Good Morning;

Well April can't decide if it wants to be August or March. It was a wee bit chilly last night and this morning, and 4 days ago it hit 91 degrees.

I was in the Starbucks last night, and the heating system there is schizophrenic...or maybe bipolar, lol!...swinging between too warm and too cool. When I left I had only my light weight jacket on and a tee shirt that was damp from perspiration, it was no fun waiting for the buses with the wind that was blowing.

I had one of those 'happy happy joy joy' moments yesterday afternoon when I looked up from my reading at the same time that my friend Michelle and her daughter Remy looked over from the line in front of the register and our eyes met and we burst into smiles..(well Michelle and I did, Remy was playing coy at first...lol!)..With all that has been going on in both our lives we have not been able to actually sit and talk, so these chance meetings compress a lot of emotion into a few minutes, trying to highlight the peaks and valleys of our lives into a sort of 'Cliff's Notes' synopsis. But like a snippet of music from a favorite song, or a breath of scent from a memorable cologne, the emotion and memory lingers coloring and influencing my mood for hours.

I also ran into a young woman, Kelly Walker, an artist, specifically a painter, who I had met and talked with a few times in the past year, who had asked me to vote for her in the Baker Awards. Which is a local competition for artists. She told me she had won one of the $1,000 prizes, The People's Choice Awards, and an exhibition at the Baltimore Museum Of Art, in the McCall Gallery, that is running through June 27th.

I remember asking her, jokingly, the first time I spoke to her after seeing her in Starbucks often in her paint smeared overalls, "Pictures or Houses?", and she replied "Both". Not only is she a fine artist, she is also an architectural artist. Congratulations Kelly!

( www.bakerartistawards.org/nomination/view/Artstar/3756 )

I'm about to head over to the Starbucks to kill some time now. I amy be stooping at Jenn's to shower later this afternoon or evening, or might just wait until tomorrow, if they are planning to go to church so I can have the house to myself for a while.

If I am not here at the library Sunday, I'll see you all on Monday afternoon. In the morning..(04/12/2010)..I am going to Health Care For The Homeless (HCH) with Liz, my case manager to see what's what, and get some information about my options now that I know that I have had Medical Assistance since last July...(Thanks D.D.S. for informing me of the change....NOT!!!)

Later............Dave

"Stop...Look.......And.............LISTEN!..............."

Good Afternoon ...Again;

I just added a new link to the 'Links And Thinks' sidebar:

www.umbrellaradio.com

local artists, local music

all day, all night

continuosly

Thnks John Erby

...........Dave

Stealing From The Native Hawaiians Again. (The Akaka Bill In Congress.)

Good Afternoon;
This is a link to the Return Voyage web site of my dear friends 'Iokepa Hanalei 'Imaikalani and Inette Miller 'Imaikalani.
Read--Think--Act Your Conscience

http://returnvoyage.com/wordpress/?p=1297

Thanks.....Dave

"Synchronicity...............Perspective..................Sympathy.................Empathy..................Righteous Indignation........"

Good Morning;

We've all used the phrase 'I was just thinking about you/her/him' when someone calls or talks about a person, but it is usually in a figurative sense, and we mean sometime in the recent past. Well I was sitting in the sunshine, but out of the wind on the side of the library eating my breakfast and thinking of my friend Allen and how to find out which medical facility he is in and how he is doing and how to contact him, and if I could do anything to bring him comfort. When at that very moment a woman walking in to the library with her grandson stops, turns, and asks.."Are you the guy who writes the blog?" It turns out she is Allen's sister, who I have met once in passing and Allen introduced us.

She told me he is now in St. Agnes Hospital, in sepsis from kidney failure and undergoing dialysis, rushed there from Kernan Hospital , (U.M.M.S.), where he was undergoing rehabilitation related to the amputation of his left foot, which happened after he was transferred to University Hospital, (also U.M.M.S.) Shock Trauma Unit from Sinai Hospital, (all in Baltimore). He had been undergoing treatment and a skin graft on his foot due to an injury that would not heal and became infected.

DAMN!!

He is a diabetic who has been vigilant about his diet and medication, and has even lost weight through healthier eating habits, cutting out or down on all the tastes great but bad for you foods.

I mentioned in an earlier post that he had had the amputation, and had called me after I left some urgent messages on his cell phone, not having seen or heard from him in a month. The last thing I heard, he was about to be transferred to a nursing home for rehab.

This latest news is a real shock, and the fact that I LITERALLY was thinking of him at the very moment his sister spoke to me is eerie.

This is another episode that forces me to view and review my life and place in the world with a new perspective. To give thanks for the blessings I have, though they may not seem as blessings to others, and to find ways to express that gratitude. When I take a look at the past 4 months and the changes that have occurred and the opportunities that have arisen, and realize that within the same time frame he has been going through hell, I have to stop and take a deep breath.

It is easy to live in the moment and accept the gifts and friendships and relationships I now have, that take so much of the sting out of the lack of creature comforts and physical shelter, and though you, loyal reader, may find it hard to believe if compare your socio-economic level to mine, it is easy for me to slip into a state of hubris regarding what I have, forgetting to show gratitude and humility.

And in that same vein, I want to ask you google Matthew and Albert Snyder, and read about the injustice done them by the sick twisted "westboro baptist church" and "fred phelps" (I'll be damned before I capitalize these assholes) their leader,who celebrated the death of (Matthew), an American soldier killed in Iraq, by desecrating his funeral and burial by demonstrating and waving signs stating 'thank g-d for dead soldiers' and shouting out that it is g-d's punishment of America for condoning gays. Read about his (Albert's), resulting lawsuit, and the overturning of the verdict in his favor by The Supreme Court, plus, adding insult to injury, his (Albert, the father), being ordered to pay some of these sick f*cks court costs!!!!!

(or go to the link below)

( http://www.matthewsnyder.org/ )

(but google them also to get a bigger picture from other sites)

I have been angry and offended by these sick f*cks for a good while, but the Supreme Courts totally screwed up decision 2 weeks ago has set me off. I tried to write something about this for a while but have not been able to stay calm and coherent enough until now. I could live with, though not like or agree with, overturning the lower courts decision on free speech grounds, (and I cannot deny their right to their opinion, but I can deny their methods), but to ask the man to PAY the people who desecrated and violated this young man's funeral, who abused and violated a father's last farewell to his son is just wrong on any yardstick you want to measure it by. I sent off a money order for $5.00 to do what I could to help defray these abusive and punitive and morally unfair expenses, and I only wish I could do more, but I'm down to my last $19.00 right now, and Food Stamps...so I am putting out the word here from my soapbox...do whatever you can to help right this grievous wrong, by whatever means you can, be it political or financial. I know at least 7 of the folks who read this regularly have children in or about to enter military service for our country.....what if it was your child, or niece or nephew, or spouse for that matter. However you may feel about the content of these assholes message..(and I am pretty certain you can tell what I think about it and them)..you have to admit their forum is dead wrong, on any grounds!

Okay, enough said, I am actually tired and sore from being up all night thinking about this, and then to hear about my friend Allen, I am emotionally drained too.

I am loose ends this weekend, so I would welcome any one's company who might want to hook up somewhere. (Please?) Write me, I'll be back here tomorrow morning for sure, and possibly later today, or call me on the '340' exchange, if you have my numbers, (I have 10 minutes left on that phone, but 0 on the '908' number), or look for me at the Starbucks in Mt. Washington later today..(and unless I get a response or some cash, most likely tomorrow and Sunday too).

In case anyone is interested, the first show, (before noon, usually between 10:15 am. and 11:45 am.) is only $5.00 at the AMC Owings Mills 17 Theatres.

(And btw, when did the Valley Centre AMC Theatres close up??)

I'm outta here...............

..............later, Dave

(p.s. thank you Spell Check....I must really be tired....Some serious transposing of letters today................

'a whole lotta shakin' goin' on'

.....LOL..........D.

"Once Upon A Time...........OR .................Fairy Stories For the Feds!......................."

Good Evening;

I'm just killing a few minutes before the library closes, and I've got a couple-three things to mention.

First, Kudos to Evan Serpick, editor of Baltimore Magazine for printing a correction in the April issue, regarding S.S.I as opposed to T.D.A.P. It clarifies the fiscal resources I do have, and puts them in a proper perspective.....Thanks Evan!

Second, I forgot to note that when Liz and I got back from Wal-Mart, we spent about 3 hours filling out one of the novel length forms I received from S.S.A., covering everything from the time I get up in the morning, until I go to bed at night, and how many times I fart in a day, and all the whys and whats about my various injuries and abilities and the changes in capabilities.and on and on and on.

Damn out of time, but not out of thoughts....oh well.....closing time....later.......Dave

"I Can Run Faster And Jump Higher In My PF Flyers........................"

Good Afternoon;

So I met with Liz, my case manager from Prologue this morning about 9:00 am., and we went to Wal-Mart in Owings Mills and I was able to pick up some shorts, (really cheesy soft denim elastic waist with drawstring type..but better than none...AND free...lol), a package of briefs, (I don't do boxers unless I have to...lol), and a nice new pair of sneakers/tennis shoes/trainers/athletic shoes...whatever thay are called now!!..from Dr. Scholls, believe it or not. They were within the price range and reasonably stylish, and a neutral tan that works with jeans or shorts and does not standout. And what the hell, they're DR SCHOLLS!!, with all the walking I do, with the air pillow insoles and the gel pouches imbedded here and there and the heel cup an all the rest of the crap, "dey can't hoit!!"

I want to extend my thanks and appreciation to everyone I've met so far at Prologue, they have been nothing but helpful, and more important, honestly cheerfully so,

later....Dave

"Under The Big Top..............."

Good Afternooon;

Rachel and I had a great time at the circus last night. We rode down on the Metro subway with Jenn and Devin & Tom and Edward. We got off at the State Center/Cultural Center stop as we always do, but Tom said it was too much changing trains, so they went on down to Charles Center and walked over to the First Mariner Arena, We walked over to the Light Rail, and Rachel played arond the sculpture in front of the Meyerhoff as we usually do, and then we caught the train, which goes right to the door of the arena. We were sitting in different seats from them and from what Jenn tells me it is better off we did. They were surrounded by idiots, while we had no one behind us and well mannered families on both sides and in front. It turns out that Jenn and Devin left at intermission because Devin had reached the end of attention span, Tom and Ed left shortly after, partly due to the animals around them and partly because ????, I can only guess that Ed pushed Tom just a little too far.

We had a blast, and Rachel both enjoyed the show immensely and was a joy to be with. The theme was magic and illusion and the show this year is called Zing, Zang, Zoom! Disappearing elephants and show girls plus clowns and tigers and dogs and horses and acrobats on high wire, swinging boards, hanging ribbons, and a pair of men on spinning pendulums...way cool!

I got an e-mail from Jenn as we exited the show telling me to call her, and shetold me they were home. I told her we would take the trains home and we could then take Rachel home in Jenn's car. When we got to Rachel's house the 'ex' started bitching about how late it was..(11:00 pm.!!!!!).. not for Rachel's sake but because SHE had to get up in the morning. She knows how long the circus and the trains take, if she knew she had to be up early the silly bitch could have volunteered to meet us at the train and shave an hour off the time!

But all in all, for Rachel and I it was a good night.

I gotta go now, be back later........Dave

"Better The Big Top.......Than The Big House.................................."

Good Morning;

Just stopped in to check my e-mail, then I am on the way to Jenn's to do laundry and shower and cook some chops I bought at the Giant; on sale, reduced, and with a $2.00 off coupon! Feed the whole house for $7.00 and have leftovers for sandwiches...can't beat that with a stick! I love to food shop....LOL!

Tonight is the circus and Paul gave Rachel and I $20.00 to spend. We are going the smart, frugal route. Instead of one $20.00 trademarked and name branded piece of crap that will not last through the show and $10.00 cotton candy..YES $10.00!!!...we are doing the dollar store, bring our own candy and get 20 toys later on.

I amy be back, but if not, see you tomorrow.

....Dave

"Above And Beyond The Call Of Duty....................................."

Good Afternoon;

Well for once, good has triumphed over evil....(or at least arrogance, incompetence, obstructionism and rudeness)!!........

Common sense, human decency, kindness, courtesy, helpfulness and a little righteous indignation came together and coalesced into a powerful force today and focused it's power into the form of my case worker from Prologue, Liz!

As I left you loyal reader I was on my way to meet with her to try to straighten out my prescription coverage mess.

I walked towards the door and she met me, holding open the door and grinning ear to ear, having seen me dodging traffic crossing the street. She tells me she has already been on the phone and has good news...I don't have P.A.C. (Personal Adult Care..the bottom rung minimalist state health coverage)!...HUH!?..Good News?!....Nope, she says, I have Medical Assistance...appproved as of JULY 2009!!!...WTF!? great job D.S.S., almost as good as S.S.A. in the notification department! (oh, and by the way, my refills expired last June, and I could not get a renewal...??!!??). We called the Beneficiary Services # and confirmed that I could fill these new 'scrips', using my old M.A. card..(oh, and by the way the M.C.O. I was assigned was JAI, [involuntarily] which is why I had no hassles there yesterday). So Liz dropped me off at Jenn's on her way to another appointment and I grabbed my old card and headed off to meet Paul..(and the MTA was MIA, so I had to take the Metro and he picked me up at the station and we went to Burger King...good thing too, he said the Starbucks was way too hot and sunny, still the same problem as last year...we talked and then he dropped me at the Rite Aid I went to last evening, where the pharmacist was so helpful. But who was NOT there today...story of my life...I handed the prescriptions, my M.A. card, and the phone number of the Beneficiary Services Dept. that we had called for confirmation and who told me to have the pharmacist call if any problems arose, to the technician at the counter with said information and instructions. Well the lazy ass pill pusher of a pharmacist did not bother with any of it and 40 minutes later..(after listening to customer after customer either tell me of their horror stories of this woman or complain at the counter about a problem of some sort and during which time I browsed the store and found some Tee shirts [in larger sizes too!!] on sale @$10.00 for 5...and bought 3, all blue LOL! for $6.00 )..she calls my name..(which is another thing, she will not raise her voice to be heard above the MUZAK playing over the waiting area, and will not repeat a name once called...WTF??)..to tell me I was denied. I asked her to call the number and she said I had to call, I said NO..You have to to get the proper authorization! I heard her call and get one of those automated directories..which I found out later was NOT the number I had given her, but some other number off her computer. Again she said I was denied..now I had heard with my own flappy ears that I had been approved, so I asked her to try again, and she began to rudely state that this was not her job...yadda..yadda..yadda. I asked for the 'scrip' back and stormed outside before I blew up. Outside I called Liz to let her know and expected to meet her in the morning to deal with it. She said Don't Go Anywhere!, I'll call you back. 15 minutes later she calls and says she had the M.A. rep., the JAI rep., and the pharmacist on a conference call..when the pharmacist hung up! She called me right back and said she was on her way to the RiteAid...WAIT!

So when she shows up a few minutes later, we go back to the pharmacy, where the pharmacist ignores us as long as possible, when Liz introduces herself and explains that she has the JAI rep on her cell phone and she wants to talk to her, the pharmacist refuses to, saying she can't talk on the cell phone, and refuses to call down to JAI...at this point I had to walk off....when I came back we sat for 20 minutes, Liz having told me it should have been straightened out. When asked for some information as to when it would be filled, the pharmacist asked for the paperwork again...and BEGAN to fill it. 10 minutes later we left with my BP meds, muscle relaxer and anti-fungal creme..all in stock and non-narcotic items.

This woman was a real piece of work, and seems to be a prime example of a certain segment of black African..(I do not know what nationality)..male and female. I have seen them as nurses, cabbies, technicians, doctors, and civil servants...they are never wrong and better than everyone else...I am just glad that I was not an African-American in this situation...they get treated worse by these people.

I plan to find out her name, and contact RiteAid's upper management, and express my disapproval...with adequate confirmation and documentation.

BUT Liz!!!

WOW,

I was amazed at the time and effort she has put out in my behalf already, and when she told me about the conference call, it really surprised me. But when she jumped in her own car, and I found out later by overhearing a conversation, on her own time, and came to the pharmacy and confronted and would not back down from this fool...I was blown away!

I was starting to be overwhelmed by frustration, and overcome by anxiety, and resorting to anger....Thanks Liz!!

Okay, I'm out of time again..

see you Tomorrow!

........Dave

"Time To....................'Come Out Of The Closet'.............................."

Good Morning;

(In yesterdays post, just to clarify the time frame, the first sentence is referring to Saturday afternoon and evening.)

What happened to spring? It was 75 degrees at 7:30 am. on the 6th of April, with a projected maximum high, (ahhh...does that term bring back memories......lol), of 87 degrees either today or tomorrow! Normal average high temperature is 61 degrees. Well it is supposed to cool off by Friday, with highs only in the upper 50's.

Baltimore!: If You Don't Like The Weather.....Wait 10 Minutes!!!!

So Liz called me this morning, she was on the road, and has appointments this morning, but will call me when she gets back to the office and I am going to shoot down from the library to meet her. I hope she can get some answers and straighten out my prescription mishegas. She sent me an e-mail Monday and told me that Prologue has a Wal-Mart account that may be used for footwear and some clothing....Great!! My boots are not only dead, they are killing what is left of my feet! and I HAVE to get a pair of shorts, I just hope there is are some 'fat clothes', I really put on weight this winter..(Thanks Jenn!!!.........LOL), as I (officially) found out on the scale at the doctors yesterday. The actual numbers....you don't wanna know...(and I'm too embarrassed to tell you......let's just say I have not been this heavy since before Jenn was born and I went on the Liquid Protein Fast, and lost the equivalent of a whole person...I'm not THAT heavy now, though my perception of self feels that I am.)

Which means that I have 3 pathways to chose from,

1) F*ck and eat my way into oblivion

2) Escape the reality and go back to shooting up, [and lose weight in a bad way..]

3)LOSE SOME DAMN WEIGHT!!!

1) and 2) cancel each other out...{Been There-Done That}

that leaves 3).....

So....now to hope that I can find a doctor who will actually listen and look at my past medical history, and work with me to devise a reasonable plan of diet, exercise, appetite suppressants, and metabolic stimulants.

(I can find the meds on my own, but I will give the legit way a shot first)

Liz just called, I'm walking down to Prologue now.

Be back later, after I meet with Paul for coffee at the Starbucks at St. Thomas around 2:30 pm.,

later..........................Dave

P.S. see the stories about the census taker and the high functional developmentally disabled guy.....

Google: 'census troll closet' ,

I heard it as a 3rd hand anecdote, but I think it is actually 'urban legend' in nature....either way it is hilarious.....Thank God for Skittles........LOL!

"And The Other Shoe Drops!........................WHAM!!!!"

Good Evening;

Well first the happy stuff, I stopped over Jenn's and had the house all to myself for a few hours, so I showered, washed and dryed clothes, and pigged out on her meatloaf while watching the cable. Once I sat down, it was all over and I never made it to the dinner Saturday evening. Sunday after spending the morning sitting and enjoying the sun and breeze, I picked up Rachel and we went to the Maryland Science Center at the Harbor and saw Tim Burton's "Alice In Wonderland" in 3D on the IMAX. Weird, Wild, and Really Cool!!...(Thanks Marianne...How was Myrtle Beach, and your Easter?)..

We are going to the Circus Wednesday night...(Thanks AGAIN Marianne!!!!!)...and are riding down on the train with Jenn & Tom & Ed & Devin, though they got their half price tickets later and had to settle for upper concourse seats. {Which is really ok, because Rachel and I like to be on our own for the show...more peaceful..enough clowns in the show, don't need clowns like Ed next to us..lol}.

I called Jenn last night and asked to stay over so I could shower in the morning and go to JAI, the edema and BP are beginning to bug me, and slept...HAH!! on the couch. It was one of THOSE nights, head buzzing, upstairs stereo pumping out sub-sonics, legs aching and cramping, and arms and legs going numb...sleep..HAH!!

I go to take Devin her milk and turn on the DVD of "The Brave Little Toaster" and the smell knocks me off my feet...She NEVER poops at night like that. So changing a sh*tty diaper was my alarm clock...great.

I finally made it to JAI, and waited 4 hours to see the doctor, when the tech. took my vitals the automatic computer BP machine said it was 119/78....RIIIGGHHHTTTTT!!

When Doctor Richardson took it a few times, it averaged 147/100!!!

I spent a full 40 minutes with the Doc and we discussed most of my medical issues and she sent me for x-rays, blood work and to fill the little cup...lol! She wrote prescriptions for BP meds, and a muscle relaxer, and an anti-fungal to combat the growth creeping up my legs that looks like the body double for the creature from the Black Lagoon.

And Then....THA--DUMMPPP!!!, I went to Giant to fill the 'scrips', and after submitting and resubmitting to JAI and PAC...according to them I don't exist....well I'm reasonably sure that I am here typing this little exercise in exorcism and you are reading it, so my judgement is that they are wrong. I went across the street to the RiteAid where the Pharmacist was not only polite, courteous, and concerned, but actually helpful........180 degrees from the counter person and the pill pushers apprentice at the Giant......and he tried a few diferent ways, but the same result. He proposed a few possibilities to explore with JAI or PAC tomorrow, (and on which I am hoping Liz from Prologue can act as advocate, ombudsman or intercedent for me.....my anxiety already has my BP through the roof again, and my patience and tolerance levels are shot....this frustration reaction being part of the problem that keeps me out here and which kept me from going back to the clinic for 11 and 1/2 months).

For some reason I KNEW that something would f*ck up at the pharmacy level. The last time I tried to get a 'scrip' refilled (from Giant) things got screwed up.

Well if Liz can't deal with it...screw it, no way I can pay for it....and I've gone a half year or more without.

I also found out that JAI has lost their Buprenorphine provider!...(Remember me telling you when I went to try to sign on...the doctor was on 'medical leave' for 3 months or more, with no backup?!......and some people bitch at me for 'taking care of business' on my own in a legitimate, if not legal manner?

Doctor Richardson told me, that if I can get HCH to take on my account or switch me to another provider/HMO, or better yet, to qualify for or be ablE to bill Medical Assistance...grab it and run with it!

Okay the library is throwing me out now.......

........Later................Dave

"Silly Ass Computer Program!!!............"

Hi There;

Tell me why the last post I published showed up behind the first one?

With the wrong time too!

Scroll....Scroll....Scroll!

LOL!

Sorry.............Dave

"It's the 3RD Day Of The 4TH Month..........And You Know What THAT Means.....Right????....................."

Good Morning;

It's........Drum Roll And Fanfare Please.......

Cheese Weasel Day!!!!!!!

The day the Cheese Weasel leaves bits of cheese for all the good little boys and girls, and we thank all our techie friends, geek squad members, and compu-nerds by giving them slices of cheese...(traditionally Kraft American Singles....but knock yourself out....lol!)

Really, if you don't believe me...Google it, or go to the link below:

What's Cheese Weasel Day? :: Cheese Weasel Day

See, would I lie to you, loyal reader?

later.............Dave

"Another Saturday Night And I Ain't Got Nobody..........or.........The Talking Head's Lament....................."

Good morning;

First......bits and pieces of the long post that was eaten by the computer yesterday are bubbling to the surface, like the whiskey kegs at Quicksand Bottoms in "The Hallelujah Trail".

To Becky624: Sorry 'bout 'dat!

WHEN!! I DO, (Notice the positive and confident 'when' and not 'if'....lol),

hit one of the lotteries or the 'cash fairy' endows me with a windfall, I'll take you out for the best Vegan lunch or dinner we can discover in the Baltimore/Washington vicinity....but you gotta drive.....lol.

I enjoyed reading your blog, thanks for reading mine. I'm going to have to put it into my Links and Thinks sidebar...(If that's OK?)

I had somebody last night do an 'instant answer', 'top of the mind', 'first response', 'don't think about it' type quizzes ...on me?, to me?, at me?, with me?...whatever the proper referent would be...lol. Some of the answers were obvious and what one would expect, a few were just 'random noise', meaningless 'influenced responses',...but a couple were surprising and kind of revealing, (and one was downright embarrassing and I'm going to leave it at that...lol!).

Some of the questions were repeated in a row and then again at random. There were a couple 'control questions' that had been answered previously WITH instructions to think first before answering.

One trend that showed up, which was both expected for it's appearance, and curious for it's ranking, was that I placed my (at times desperate) need and desire for physical female contact, with or without sexual overtones way, way above the importance of finding shelter, which I though was my #1 issue. I mean I know I'm lonely, but this shocked even the researcher..(a PhD candidate doing her thesis paper on the relationship between mental health and social interaction among the homeless)..with the gap between them.

Jenn just called, I have an apppointment with the shower and the laundry room.................lol.

gotta run now, I may be back before I go to the Potluck Passover Dinner at 5:30 pm. this afternoon at the Prologue building, hosted and Sponsored by the

Baltimore Jewish Cultural Chavura....see link below:

A Secular Humanistic Jewish Community - Homepage

later......................Dave

"Gremlins....!!!!!!!....."

Hi See the add on to the previous post, I finished that sentence........LOL

"Talk Soup.................".............AND An OOOPPPPSSSSSSSSS!!!............"

Good Morning;

I had a great afternoon and conversation at the Mt. Washingtom Starbucks yesterday. A guy sits down on the bench across form me on the back patio and gets out his pad and pens and a book entitled "Controlled Chaos", which caught my eye. I brought up the phrase 'Ordo Ab Chao'-'Order from Chaos', one of the mottoes of the Masons and an integral part of the plot of "the Lost Symbol" by Dan Brown. We started talking and told me he was a middle school teacher at the Grace Fellowship Church School in Timonium, and that the book was about teaching methods for children of that age group, and how the title is a perfect description for them and their minds. We chatted on and off for the next two hours, and my personal story came out and I showed him the Magazine stories and gave him the web address of the blog. He offered to buy me lunch, but I had just eaten, (I found a dollars worth of change and bought 2 packs of the Buddig lunch meats with it, and I had a couple rolls and some Bugles [and a fruit cup from the Prologue house too!...lol!]), so he handed me a bill and said it was for later, (I thanked him and stuffed it in my pocket without looking at at..turned out to be $20.00!!......Thanks Ryan!!!). It was a really good exchange of thoughts and ideas.

5,300 visitors on the hit counter.........

Thanks y'all...keep comin' back naow....ya heah!!

Sorry about the unfinished post, the computer ate my homework!!!!!!!!

I had alot of stuff that I thought was published, that WAS NOT, and now I have neither the time nor memory left to restore it...

AAHHHHH Technology!!!!!!!....LOL!

And it's doing it again...that's it I quit today!!!!

........Dave

"Oh, The Horror(scope)............................"

From the B Free Daily:

Pisces 02.19-03.20

Stay out of stressful situations this afternoon.

Uranus will make you increasingly anxious.

?????

Looks like a high 'pucker factor' day!

....D.

"It's My Lucky Day!!!!?????????!!!!!!!!!....................."

Holy Sh*T!!!!

I just looked at the Powerball ticket I bought the other day,

I hit for

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!$350,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Son of a bitch!!!

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!!!!APRIL FOOLS!!!!

But Oh Do I WISH!!!!!

;-(

Dave

"Outreach?............Out Of Range....Out Of Mind..............."

Good Afternoon;

It happened again...last night I called Jenn because I had left my razor at her apt. and I wanted her to stick it outside the door and I'd pick it up on my way past later. She answered the phone and says she is not home, she is entering Starbucks in Mt. Washington just that minute....I started laughing and told her to step out back when she got her tea....I was on the patio.......LOL.

I rode back with her after her meeting and shaved and used the bathroom at her place then took the bus up to the shed.

So I'm in the Towson library again today. I rode over to the Prologue Outreach center in Towson with my case manager Liz, to see what sort of clothing they had..(nothing I wanted, or that fit)..and to check out the place. Showers, washers and dryers, kitchen and some things like mac n cheese, and instant oatmeal, and oodles of noodles, etc. available. Some toiletries and personal care items. A couple rooms to sit in, one filled with guys sleeping on chairs and recliners with their bags around them, other a dining room with table and chairs. Nice enough place...I'll probably never be back there again. Nothing in this area that draws me, except the courthouse, so I am never here without a reason and money. And basically, it is not my 'scene', nor my 'people', I just don't relate to, or identify with those I met, nice enough guys, (the ones who were awake) I guess, but Thank You, I'll Pass. Maybe if it was really nasty out and everywhere else was closed, or if I need some items for hygiene, but that's it.

We started out in the Pikesville office, working on my 'service plan', arranging for her to go to D.S.S. with me on the 16th, and calling Health Care for the Homeless and getting an appt. for the 12th..(both in April)..supposedly HCH can get me out of JAI and into another HMO. I think I still have to go down to JAI at 7:00 am. and sit outside and wait until they open at 9:00 am. to sign in and hope to be seen, I NEED to deal with my hypertension NOW...Sh*t Sh*t Sh*t!!!

I gotta go now, I have to meet Monkee before she goes to work...back at Pikesville later, I hope

and I am officially broke now, less than a dollar in my pocket, I do have $1.73 on my emergency backup Starbucks caffiene fix card though if I do not receive my cash tomorrow.

Looks like I'll have miss Brenda's poetry reading at Red Emma's tonight though.

Later....................Dave