Monday, December 12, 2011

"Suit Up! ........Battery Back-up ............ 'Do The Litter Box' & Shrimp For The Shrimp ...............Gossamer Threads .............."

Good Afternoon;

Well, one good thing about the lack of electricity.....I'm limited to the 2 hour battery life of the TV and no laptop...(a '5 minute battery') when I CAN get to sleep, I don't waste the opportunity by being up all!

Last night was colder than the night before, and much more comfortable for me. Sounds like a contradiction, but it's just preparation.
I put the sweat pants, (my older thinner pair, not the Old Navy pair I recently realized I had stashed in a bag of stuff Allen [whom I have neither seen nor heard from in many months, and have not been able to contact, by text, phone, or e-mail, and have a really bad feeling about, considering the medical challenges he went through and was still facing],...had given me, over a year and a half ago, and I had forgotten about that are really thick.), over my jeans, old loose socks over the already warm socks I had on, and wore the already warm heavy sweat shirt I was wearing, and slipped into the cold, cold bag....after lying on top for a few minutes to take to warm it up. I pulled the hood of the bag out from under the pillow for the first time since last winter and even though the drawstring is out, it still wraps around my head....mostly. I purposely jammed the zipper with the fabric of the interior of the bag where it is ripped, at he top of it's run and pulled the drawstring around the shoulders tight around my neck. OF course I immediately needed to pee as soon as I was bundled in....must be a vestige of childhood and!
Except for spotty 'cold zones' that were much smaller than yesterday and easily remedied by a quick half asleep adjustment, I slept warm and for multi-hour time periods for the first time in a couple of months of a variety of types of insomnia ranging from certain of my meds too late in the evening, caffeine overload, musculoskeletal issues, anxiety over whether the roof of the shed was going to start leaking over where I slept, (only one, easily diverted drip in the 8 or so days the end of last and beginning of this month where we had either extreme or extended 'rain events' as the TV weather folks call them now), cable TV availability, really good book addiction, or recliner rejection/crazy cat demolition derby at Jenn's new place......whatever reasons were applicable, sleep has been a rare and precious!

After getting up at 10:00 am. and puttering around the Giant for a while I spent a good 2 & 1/2 hours waiting for MTA buses which never showed up......5, that's FIVE!, different routes had 'skipped runs' where the bus scheduled for that time never showed....not late....NOT there!
More time than actually spent traveling on 2 buses to get here to the coffee shop.

Tonight I am meeting a friend of Jenn's after their HG and going to the food store with her to trade the gift card I have for some needed cash to settle a debt tomorrow. After that she is going to drop me at the shed so I won't get to see whether the buses tonight as still as screwed up. Whether it was driver's all with the 'Monday flu'-'Raven's won hangover', or some sort of work slowdown/protest, I don't know yet. I'll see one on my 'anonymous' sources on one route or another later this week who will clue me in though.

Also tomorrow, I'm heading down to JAI about mid-afternoon to get 3 of 4 prescriptions renewed that have run out. Last night I had what seemed to be coincidental but nearly simultaneous gall bladder/pancreas 'attacks'/pain incidents and an almost crippling case of heartburn/indigestion, just as I was laying down and leaning forward to zip up the bag after getting up to pee.
Short but intense, and if I had not gone through it before and did not know how to deal with it with the meds at my disposal then and would have been very frightening. Even though the meds I had were not specifically designated for the problem, side effects I am familiar with are able to treat/attack the symptoms....quickly. Enough so that I fell back asleep within the hour. But as is said....better prevention than cure....sooo,
'Hello waiting room'....not to mention having all the drug dealers in the 'hood' I need to walk through to get there either bum rush me as a potential customer.....or avoid me like the plague as a possible 'knocker'

Just a mention of Saturday.....
Rachel and I saw "Puss In Boots" at the movies, the $6.00 10:35 am. show, and loved it! It's from the "Shrek" people and is filled with multi-level jokes and gags, and sight gags. Antonio Banderas and Selma Hayek are the lead voices, Puss and 'Kitty SoftPaws', and their chemistry is as good as it is in the "Desperado" series of movies.

And the Previews and Coming Attractions!!!!!!
"Tin Tin"!......"Return To Mysterious Island"!!......."The Lorax"!!!!
I can't freakin' wait!!!!

We went to, where, Starbucks afterwards for hot chocolate and computer time..."".....(hours...........oy!.....LOL!). She wanted to go over to Whole Foods and get lunch and of course the budding gourmet?...gourmand?..., saw the 3 types of shrimp in the prepared foods case, breaded & fried, (mehhhh.....never again cold), 'pesto', and 'garlic,lemon, parsley'...both of which were wonderful......THE TINY LITTLE TASTES I GOT OF THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...........LOL!
The nice thing is that she also, on her own accord, headed over to the salad bar to get some fresh veggies...and some tuna pasta, and she ate MY "Pasta with, Sundried Tomatoes, Garlic, Parmesan, and Chicken" also....I did get most of that!

And now, it's time to eat, I've made my self hungry and still have some food from Giant saved for dinner.

I know I don't sound like it but I'm teetering on the edge of another depression cycle, and after tomorrow am going to be basically broke and out of food until the end of the month. Now I've put money tightly away for Rachel's Chanukah gift(s), either one 'larger' (relatively that is), or a couple 'dollar store type', depending on her desires and the plans of her mother and grandparents....(THEY have the bucks, so if I don't have to, and can't compete......'quantity' works for me.).
And meds will be paid for, and laundry at Jenn's at least 2 more different weeks this month, along with whatever 'care packages' of food I leave with will see me through, and there is always the chocolate bars and the corner, so I'm not as bad as I have been...or as, in other years.......I'll get by.
But the build-up, hype, and sudden drop and let down.....and/or 'crash & burn' related to Xmas and NYE is always a stone bitch to deal with, especially homeless, broke, and more than anything else.....alone.
So the unreasonably mellow glow I'm feeling is a twist.
I can pinpoint it to a meeting for coffee and conversation last week with Michelle, agreed to previously as 'date TBD', and re-initiated by a text from me. And even more so to a single text on Saturday when I was on the train here with Rachel, and asking if I was at the coffee shop and did I want to meet?
Time, distance, and transportation and communication glitches prevented us from doing so, but the glow still exists, though fading.
Among almost all, 99%, of the people who I call friends, the ones who are actually happy to get a call and wanting, willing, or able to come out if invited.......I am almost always the one to suggest, invite, or initiate said happening.
So it was particularly pleasing and gratifying to have someone who I not only care for deeply as a treasured friend, but don't get to see enough, and
who..well buy my book of poetry and unless you're blind or stupid my "true feelings" are about as hidden as Santa at a Chassidic Chanukah!, contact me.
Which is something I do really miss, 'getting' a (personal) phone call (or text or e-mail or FB msg.) for a change that isn't in reference to a negative event as related to a friend, relative, or former lover.
(Notwithstanding, the calls from Jenn, or Rachel...etc.)

Anyway, as thin and delicate thread as it may be, THAT is keeping me on this side of the old yin/yang divide leading to the abyss.


P.S. Even though last night was warm enough, the double clothing is not always a viable option, due to wetness, cleanliness, odor, and just the sheer lack of available clean clothing I own vs. laundry opportunities.

The "Blanket Request" (I love puns...LOL!) for quilts etc. is still open.

No comments: