"Under Pressure................"

Good afternoon;

It's Friday and the library closes at 5:30, so even though it is such a nice day out, I'm going to sit here and make up for lost time, catch up on the news, answer e-mails and make an early post. I never made it to the clinic this morning, yeah I know..., but I feel dirty, and I am embarrassed to strip down and see the doctor like this, and I must admit, as I have said before, I really hate sitting in the ghetto atmosphere of the clinic, it is the same as sitting in the 'bullpen' at the jail.

I am feeling a little shaky still, so I'm going to take it easy as I can this weekend. I am so broke it is not even worth stressing over at this point, when I find out that I owe $11,980.56, and payment is expected within a month, or I am going to be 'Detained'...yeah right...like that will help the money magically appear. I'm trying to survive on $185.00 worth of Food Stamps, and $185.00 cash a month, and my meds, which are my first priority, because I AM NOT going back to using dope, at any price..come first, no matter what!

So my attitude has to be..screw it..if I let it get to me, it'll kill me.......the consensus being that stress was the major cause of yesterday's near fatal blodd pressure spike. I talked to a doctor this morning, turns out that it is a good thing I did not realize just HOW serious the situation was, my cluelessness helped to keep me calmer and to allow my BP and heart rate to subside quicker.

I am supposed to go to Kat's Thesis Exhibition this evening, I don't think I can make it, for the same reasons I did not go to the doctor's this morning, well SOME of the same reasons, mainly I need a shower and my change of clothes is dirty...the waiting room discomfort does not apply, nor is the whole 'fear' issue applicable here.

I am extremely disappointed at this, and unless I can find some place soon to bathe, I am going to miss it. The irony here is that if I do miss it, I will be standing almost directly outside of where the gallery is, doing my 'Please Help' gig just up the street. It's Friday at rush hour and I would skip it for the show..but I am not going to the show feeling or looking like a bum, I could work around the shower, but my clothes are filthy, wrinkled, and smelly from being balled up in a bag waiting to be washed. I'm not going into MICA like that.

Don't Forget:
The Walk For A Cure For Lupus

tomorrow---Saturday April 25th

find details at my post

"Kat Scratch Fever"

or Kat's website

http://www.katgallery.net/

I was going to spill all the details that led up to my encounter on Monday with the police and the subsequent 'vacation' in Towson, but I am too tired, and do not really want to get started on a rant that may come back to bite me..I'll tell you all about it at a later date...maybe after this Starbucks finally closes up and the employees are dispersed to other stores that I will not be traveling to.....(just ask any teacher how a minor's petty comments can haunt them for a long time, one false accusation can do untold damage).

This Sunday is the last one that the library will be open until October, so I will be skipping at least one post EVERY week, not counting the occasional OOPS! day.

Ok I am gone for now..I should be back for a bit tomorrow, and possibly checking in just before closing today............see ya........Dave