Thursday, May 7, 2009

"If..'East Is East..and West Is West..and Never The Twain Shall Meet'....Why Do I Feel As If I Am Living In Seattle?.....OR.....'Rain Rain Go AWAY!!!"

Good Morning;

One more day of rain, so what's new? I'm going out today and searching for people with carpentry, animal husbandry, and circumnavigational sailing experience......if you are interested, answer this one simple question..."What's a Cubit?". Please complete all applications using waterproof ink.....Thank you!

So...God smiled on me again last night, I ended up with enough cash for a room again, {that makes 4 nights in a row that I've slept inside,..IN A BED!, showered,..9 times in 3&1/2 days, (because I could!....LOL), and 3 days without Starbucks coffee!}, as I said yesterday, if I could find a way to accumulate what I do in a smaller number of increments, or larger lump sums it would give me a chance to get a place for at least a month, and with that footing, I think that just that little bit of stability could be the start of an 'upwardly mobile' progression. I guess I'm going to have to take every second of this current period of "anti-depressive, non bipolar, cyclical upswing"..(actual mental health professional's quote!), and "Go For The Gusto" as the old beer ads used to say..(Schlitz?). What a difference that being clean,(in this case, hygienically...but also in relation to chemicals,..and spiritually too), make to the mindset of someone on the streets. And few nights in a room, being treated as a normal guest,(after the first night, in the beginning I was looked upon with some suspicion.....I guess when nothing was trashed or missing in the room they decided that I was ok...LOL)(and I do not want to sound bigoted, but...after a number of stays at the motels at the lower end of the price range..[not flophouses..I can't find any! only "hot sheet joints"....with hourly rates, "for those in need of a nap or a layover"..{another actual quote!}]..which is about $60.00 a night, I have found almost all of them to be owned/managed/staffed by Southwest Asian or Middle Eastern folks,(families, seemingly in most cases), and coming from a part of the world where hospitality is supposedly not only a tradition, but ingrained into all of the major religions in the area...something must have been lost in transit. This is not only me saying this. In conversation with other guests, mostly businessmen and women, there is a consensus that there is little if any extension of courtesy, beyond the lip service required in a transaction, and no flexibility, even for people who have stayed for days or weeks, or who return regularly. I have also talked with other guys who are on the street,(at various levels of social, educational, and 'mental and emotional' stability/ability),and sometime stay in a motel when a windfall occurs, and they report such indignities as being refused a room when there are obvious vacancies, with excuses like, 'too many reservations, or no clean rooms, or having to pay extra deposits for non existing charges, and then having to fight to get them refunded. I had to sign a 'pledge' saying I would not smoke in the room at the Red Roof Inn, on Reisterstown Rd. in Baltimore City, a noted trouble spot on the Police Dept's. watch list,(a popular weekend drug and drinking party site for gansta's, wanksta's and wannabee's,see Baltimore Sunpapers archive), and I had to get someone to come to the room to witness the smell of smoke that was coming in through the cracks in the wall and the bathroom fan so I would be able to get my deposit back in the morning! This is not a condemnation of any race or culture, just a commentary on a segment of the hopitality industry that is really an oxymoron.

Okay..that boys and girls is what we call "going off on a tangent". (The good thing about being an amateur writer is that I can get away with it by saying....OOPS Sorry.......LOL)

If it seems as if I am in an ureasonably good mood, it is because I am, I actually accomplished a few things this week relating to my health, and started in motion some more bureaucratic paper slides towards resolving some issues,(long term stuff....more details later).I was also blessed by some gifts, a lottery win, seeing Rachel a few times, finding some cash last night in the gutter (paid for most of the room), and just realizing that a change of routine was sorely needed, I was in a rut at the Starbucks every morning that was keeping me from getting out and about as often as I need to, and since there were so many good people there, I did not recognize the problem for what it was.

I also, just for sh*ts and giggles dropped 11 applications for jobs at various locations as I walked up Reisterstown Rd. yesterday, was interviewed on 7 of them, and got turned down on all of them, when the store owner's/mgrs. eventually realized that Homeless in the Address space, was not the name of an Estate, but a stae of existence.....LOL. I really did not expect any other results, but this was an exercise and example in futility..no not exactly, more like...frustration....a kind of rebuttal to the morons who like to shout out "get a job" as they drive by, with no clue as to any of the issues involved as to 'why'.

So I don't know if it is a case of 'the power of positive thinking' or 'fatalism' at work right now, there are still some seriously effed up things happening both inside and outside my skull....such as?..you ask...well for example....

I don't know where I'm going to sleep, or spend the night; I am again out of the ONLY meds(Suboxone)that really, really matter to me, with no idea how or where to get more in the next 24 hours,(which is the time left of the halflife), and unless I can Monkee,(who is dealing with her own tragedy at the moment) can find some, I have not the cash to purchase more at this time. It is storming...again, and unless it stops, I'll not be able to hit the streets. Rachel's birthday is in 6 days and I have not yet figured out how to raise the cash to get her the presents she wants(and that I want to give her....she REALLY wants more 'Princess' gear and garb...she is so funny some times. Yesterday we werewalking past the Md. State Police headquarters bldgs. and there were some work(release)men using a grinder and wire brush on the steel letters over the archway, and she tells me she wants to be a 'worker' when she grows up, so she can build buildings, and fix them...and a person who drives the rocket ship to Jupiter..and a teacher....and maybe a doctor..or a painter and a dancer! She is going to be busy!!!)

I have a court date on May 19th, where the court expects me to come up with $12,000 dollars, oh well, I've done jail before......LOL. I am awaiting the results of the latest liver function test...we know damn well that they are not going to be any better.....a holding action will be satisfactory....Oh Yeah...and Medical Assistance is turning me down again.

Ya Know...It's a good thing I'm schizo with a multitude of personalities....or I might go crazy trying to figure out which mood to be in at what time!! Now I can just let myself go full goose gonzo, and cover them all at once!!

Well that's about it for now, I think we are pretty much caught up...oh I know I've forgotten some things..but you know I'm always coming back online to babble about something.

See you later..............Dave

See I told you I'd remember something. I'd like to welcome and thank the 2 new followers...."X", and Griswold...enjoy yourself and remember...."Keep You Hands And Arms Inside The Ride At All Times, The Management Is Not Liable For Any Bad Puns Or Accidental Amputations...........and Sanity Is An Option! Not A Requirement In All Posts.............YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!"
...........Dave

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